So my wife and I have been on the rocks for a long time. We just recently had a very good weekend, and then she calls me today at work.
Back story: Sunday after church we briefly speak to our business partner. I tell him we will meet the following weekend to discuss a business matter. She is with me and says nothing.
Fast forward to today: she calls me frustrated and worked up. She needs us to discuss a business matter with them that is time sensitive to this week Thursday. But, she wants me to do it because she is frustrated. I ask her why she can't and she says that I am better at this. This is true sometimes but she is very skilled when she wants to be.
I immediately saw this as a **** test. I called her on it, and told her it was a cop out to pass the call on to me. Then starts the circular argument with her saying it was my responsibility because I told him we would talk next week and he is out of town the whole week. The funny thing is she had an opportunity to talk to him after church too but said nothing. I tell her no again and she hangs up on me.
Then she calls back and starts in again about this being what I always do, which is essentially deflecting blame and not accepting responsibility. I tell her she can call me back when she is ready to be rational. She again tries to issue blame and I take the bait. Right back to the circular argument again.
Ugh. So feedback please: sh** test or am I wrong?
And I know I handled it poorly. Just curious if I should stand firm or eat crow.
Back story: Sunday after church we briefly speak to our business partner. I tell him we will meet the following weekend to discuss a business matter. She is with me and says nothing.
Fast forward to today: she calls me frustrated and worked up. She needs us to discuss a business matter with them that is time sensitive to this week Thursday. But, she wants me to do it because she is frustrated. I ask her why she can't and she says that I am better at this. This is true sometimes but she is very skilled when she wants to be.
I immediately saw this as a **** test. I called her on it, and told her it was a cop out to pass the call on to me. Then starts the circular argument with her saying it was my responsibility because I told him we would talk next week and he is out of town the whole week. The funny thing is she had an opportunity to talk to him after church too but said nothing. I tell her no again and she hangs up on me.
Then she calls back and starts in again about this being what I always do, which is essentially deflecting blame and not accepting responsibility. I tell her she can call me back when she is ready to be rational. She again tries to issue blame and I take the bait. Right back to the circular argument again.
Ugh. So feedback please: sh** test or am I wrong?
And I know I handled it poorly. Just curious if I should stand firm or eat crow.
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