It's probably nothing new. Many have gone and are going through it but it's my story.
I love my wife.
She has always enjoyed attention. She pledged her faithfulness and I believed her. And honestly if she pledged it again I'd still believe her.
She's Chinese. She goes back twice a year. Three years ago she returned to China for the summer mainly to see friends and travel. I can give more specifics but afterwards she returned home telling me she travelled with a man friend and developed feelings for him. As it turned out she stayed at his apartment during the summer visit.
She apologized and said she understood if I could not forgive her. She said she regretted it. I love her. I want her. She makes me happy. But it hurt. She promised it was over and that the summer was just a "thing." It was out of her system.
She's a fitness fanatic. We are both fit. She does draw the eyes of many men. She brags about it and I laugh with her. Men can show her attention, I thought, but there's no harm as long as she was faithful.
A few weeks ago she was in bed and I was sitting in the living room. Her phone was on the table next to me charging along with mine. She received a text and it displayed on her screen. It said, "good night you sweet thing." It was from a man I know from our club.
The next morning I handed her the phone and asked what was going on. She admitted she was flirting with the guy by text messages only. She was angry with me for snooping but I wasn't. It was a message that displayed directly to her phone's main display.
I was suspicious and checked our cell phone bill. I found several incoming and outgoing calls and text messages to two men from our club. She denied anything was going on and that I was in the wrong for checking our phone activity.
She said the text messages were innocent but flirtatious. She never slept with them. She promised the text messages would stop.
Two days ago I was paged out at home from my work. I picked up house phone and pressed history to page back to find my office's data center phone number. There in the history was one of the men's number showing he called into our house. I asked her about it and she said it must have been a misdial and that she has not been in contact with him.
The past two days have been stressful. I feel she hasn't been honest. Nothing adds up. When I got home tonight she left right away saying nothing. Our daughter, actually my step daughter, told me my wife was going to the club.
This is where I went wrong. I used the Find My Phone function for her phone. She was at the home of they guy that called into our house. I actually drove there and found our car parked. I started driving home and called her cell. She didn't answer but called me right back. I admitted what I did and knew where she was. She admitted she was with him.
She said she loves me and went to his house to break it off. But now that I know she can't face me. She said she's sorry she hurt me but can't come home. She asked that I give her some time. I was confused. She said she wanted to break it off with him but now that I know she wanted to stay there with him because "it didn't really matter any more." She said she still loves me but says I'll never be able to forgive her.
I understand her feelings. She is a stay at home mom. Her day is going to the club to work out. Maybe she's been going to see him too, I don't really know. I work and come home. I know it may sound self serving but I cook and clean and do laundry. She is nice to me and compliments me saying she is living a dream. She is thankful for what I do. I feel good. But then all this has happened. I'm sick. I don't know where I went wrong. She is torn between her life here and whatever this other man can provide. I have to be strong in front of my step daughter (17 years old) spas the daughter has AP tests tomorrow. I have to take care of her.
I know my wife is sad and so am I. I don't know if she will come home. If she doesn't I'm afraid how I will feel resentment. If she stays I'm thinking her loyalties are with him and his feelings despite saying she loves me.
I'm a professional man with a good career.
The other man is a marriage counselor.
I don't know if I'm asking for advice or sympathy or just to write this out. I'm sure I've done things wrong that has made her find interest in others. I know she's responsible for her own actions too.
I hope she comes home. If so I'm hopeful we can piece this together. If she doesn't then I'm afraid I will resent it.
I know I made myself out to be a saint. I'm not a bad guy.
I am sad tonight. Very sad.
That's the story. As plain as I can say it.
Please forgive my typos. Thank you.
I love my wife.
She has always enjoyed attention. She pledged her faithfulness and I believed her. And honestly if she pledged it again I'd still believe her.
She's Chinese. She goes back twice a year. Three years ago she returned to China for the summer mainly to see friends and travel. I can give more specifics but afterwards she returned home telling me she travelled with a man friend and developed feelings for him. As it turned out she stayed at his apartment during the summer visit.
She apologized and said she understood if I could not forgive her. She said she regretted it. I love her. I want her. She makes me happy. But it hurt. She promised it was over and that the summer was just a "thing." It was out of her system.
She's a fitness fanatic. We are both fit. She does draw the eyes of many men. She brags about it and I laugh with her. Men can show her attention, I thought, but there's no harm as long as she was faithful.
A few weeks ago she was in bed and I was sitting in the living room. Her phone was on the table next to me charging along with mine. She received a text and it displayed on her screen. It said, "good night you sweet thing." It was from a man I know from our club.
The next morning I handed her the phone and asked what was going on. She admitted she was flirting with the guy by text messages only. She was angry with me for snooping but I wasn't. It was a message that displayed directly to her phone's main display.
I was suspicious and checked our cell phone bill. I found several incoming and outgoing calls and text messages to two men from our club. She denied anything was going on and that I was in the wrong for checking our phone activity.
She said the text messages were innocent but flirtatious. She never slept with them. She promised the text messages would stop.
Two days ago I was paged out at home from my work. I picked up house phone and pressed history to page back to find my office's data center phone number. There in the history was one of the men's number showing he called into our house. I asked her about it and she said it must have been a misdial and that she has not been in contact with him.
The past two days have been stressful. I feel she hasn't been honest. Nothing adds up. When I got home tonight she left right away saying nothing. Our daughter, actually my step daughter, told me my wife was going to the club.
This is where I went wrong. I used the Find My Phone function for her phone. She was at the home of they guy that called into our house. I actually drove there and found our car parked. I started driving home and called her cell. She didn't answer but called me right back. I admitted what I did and knew where she was. She admitted she was with him.
She said she loves me and went to his house to break it off. But now that I know she can't face me. She said she's sorry she hurt me but can't come home. She asked that I give her some time. I was confused. She said she wanted to break it off with him but now that I know she wanted to stay there with him because "it didn't really matter any more." She said she still loves me but says I'll never be able to forgive her.
I understand her feelings. She is a stay at home mom. Her day is going to the club to work out. Maybe she's been going to see him too, I don't really know. I work and come home. I know it may sound self serving but I cook and clean and do laundry. She is nice to me and compliments me saying she is living a dream. She is thankful for what I do. I feel good. But then all this has happened. I'm sick. I don't know where I went wrong. She is torn between her life here and whatever this other man can provide. I have to be strong in front of my step daughter (17 years old) spas the daughter has AP tests tomorrow. I have to take care of her.
I know my wife is sad and so am I. I don't know if she will come home. If she doesn't I'm afraid how I will feel resentment. If she stays I'm thinking her loyalties are with him and his feelings despite saying she loves me.
I'm a professional man with a good career.
The other man is a marriage counselor.
I don't know if I'm asking for advice or sympathy or just to write this out. I'm sure I've done things wrong that has made her find interest in others. I know she's responsible for her own actions too.
I hope she comes home. If so I'm hopeful we can piece this together. If she doesn't then I'm afraid I will resent it.
I know I made myself out to be a saint. I'm not a bad guy.
I am sad tonight. Very sad.
That's the story. As plain as I can say it.
Please forgive my typos. Thank you.
Put the internet to work for you.
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