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Holiday troubles- urgent :(

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Hi, sorry if this is a long post- I will try to keep it short!

I'm going on holiday with my friends in the summer, everything is booked and sorted- except for two people dropped out. The group has managed to find a replacement for these 2 people- so everything seems fine. Except I can't stand one of the replacements they have found.

I was bullied for several years during high school by a small group of girls and boys. It got so bad to the point where I was admitted to hospital for attempting to take my own life.

Although this is years ago now, one of the replacements for the holiday is one of the boys that bullied me. This boy tormented me- he called me names, circled me, threw objects at me. Every night on the bus on the way home he wouldn't leave me alone- one day he wrote abuse about me on every single window of the bus. He carried on the abuse even when he moved schools, he even carried it on after the majority of the others got bored.

I don't know what to do- there is no way I am dropping out of the holiday, because I have arranged it and have been looking forward to it for months. However, I don't want to have to tell my new friends about my past and why I dislike him so much. I'm embarrassed that I was bullied so badly, and embarrassed that I let it get to the point where I tried to end my life. I don't know how they would react.

This boy has 'hung out' with our group a couple of times recently, and to the best of my ability I have avoided talking to him. He's tried bringing it up once in front of everyone, stating he knew me from high school. Before he could say any more I managed to cut him off and change the flow of the conversation. I have mentioned briefly to my friends on a chat that I do not want him going, but it's been overlooked and no one responded to it.

I honestly don't know what to do. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal, but even being near him in a college setting makes me feel uneasy and brings back bad memories- I don't know how a whole week in an enclosed environment with him would be.

Any advice would be great- whether it's how to stop him going, or even how I can get to grips/deal with the fact he's going.

Thankyou!

In short: My friends have (unknowingly) invited a boy that used to bully me badly on holiday with us all and I don't know how to cope/react.

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