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What the hell can I do for me?

Married 17 years, she has had affairs 3 times during that time- first two i took her back, couples counseling but we are still stuck in the same old same old- she feels something has always been missing- the passion. so with thios 3rd time i said something has to be different and we both agree- I told her we are now to consider ourselves seperated. I asked her to end the affair so she can focus on herself but she wont. We are going to remain in the same house even share the same bed until summer when she plans on moving in with her mom. I told her that if she feels she needs to continue to see him thats on her, I dont think its the best for her right now but whatever. My problem is even though I dont mind her seeing him, I still find myself spying on her texts and spying on her facebook. Why do I want the details? I tell myself I have to concentrate on me but I cant stop wondering what she is doing. It sucks because she is my one true confidant and I had to tell her I am going to work at being real distant from her, but so far I have a hard time not wanting to talk to her about things. she says we have talked about everything but I still like to talk. So how do I go about stopping worrying about her and him? I know I am leaving work early today and I know I will drive by his house just to see if she is there. I told her it wouldnt bother me as much if she just told me that she was going to go see him. I know it will bother me but not as much as if she continues to sneak around. I know for our kids sake that we need to be honest with each other so we have a good parenting relationship and I think i keep testing her honesty. I know the constant snooping just drives me crazy, how do I stop?

IFTTT

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