I will try to condense this although our situation seems too much to describe. My husband is an independent contractor working for himself, making a fairly good living so that I could stay home with the kids and not work outside the home. He was working on a huge project when his contract and the money for the contract ran out last year. Still needing to finish the project to satisfy his client and their legally binding agreement, he has continued to work on the project without pay since this past September, or five months…for free. We were already living paycheck to paycheck even when he was getting paid (the employer always having a delay to pay him) and now we have run out of savings and all funds and are living off money his parents are giving us….for all our bills, mortgage, food, etc. I took a part time job to help out which was all I could find at the time, (and I am still looking for full time work.)
However, he insists that this project on which he is working is so immense and time-consuming that he couldn't handle another job right now if he tried and refuses to look for work. Part of me feels that he is relying too heavily on the generosity of his parents to support us. He was also supposed to be finishing up his dissertation for his PhD but this other project has taken precedence and now he may not be able to graduate. In other words, he's not stupid or incapable of work, he's just immersed himself in this situation and is in over his head…and now, our heads.
His parents have said they can continue to support us for a few more months but that's it. This puts huge pressure on me to find a full time job in a hurry, especially when my husband is not even looking for work! Even if he were looking, he is in a very specialized field with limited transferrable skills, and as some of you know, you don't just find a job overnight. This is affecting his health and of course our marriage. To add insult to injury, he "overlooked" paying taxes for the past 3 yrs so now we owe the IRS almost 100k, to add to the 100k he already owes for previous student loans (before he met me.) I have since taken over all the bills and taxes and responsibility for the household since he is completely incapable of handling any kind of stressor whatsoever. I am absorbed with resentment. What can I do or what would you do in this situation? I am tired of being broke and in a financial hole because of him!
However, he insists that this project on which he is working is so immense and time-consuming that he couldn't handle another job right now if he tried and refuses to look for work. Part of me feels that he is relying too heavily on the generosity of his parents to support us. He was also supposed to be finishing up his dissertation for his PhD but this other project has taken precedence and now he may not be able to graduate. In other words, he's not stupid or incapable of work, he's just immersed himself in this situation and is in over his head…and now, our heads.
His parents have said they can continue to support us for a few more months but that's it. This puts huge pressure on me to find a full time job in a hurry, especially when my husband is not even looking for work! Even if he were looking, he is in a very specialized field with limited transferrable skills, and as some of you know, you don't just find a job overnight. This is affecting his health and of course our marriage. To add insult to injury, he "overlooked" paying taxes for the past 3 yrs so now we owe the IRS almost 100k, to add to the 100k he already owes for previous student loans (before he met me.) I have since taken over all the bills and taxes and responsibility for the household since he is completely incapable of handling any kind of stressor whatsoever. I am absorbed with resentment. What can I do or what would you do in this situation? I am tired of being broke and in a financial hole because of him!
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