I'm 21, I met him 4 years ago. We've been together nearly 2 years, 10 months of which was long distance when I studied abroad.
Since I got back to England I've felt like he loves the sound of his own voice a bit too much. Like he doesn't even consider that I might already know what he's telling me, or whether he told me exactly the same thing a week ago. I know he doesn't mean to do it, but it as if he gets a subconscious kick from it, like he thinks he sounds clever and enjoys the feeling that I'll find it really interesting. We used to have really great discussions, but now I feel like it barely even matters what I say, he just likes whatever's going on in his own mind.
His group of friends(who I used to hang round with a bit) all play TF2(an fps), and I gave it a go a few years back but gave up after a while because I wasn't really enjoying it. They have all this banter about their internet memes and quotes from funny youtube gaming videos, which they repeat so many times to each other, and have such a big laugh about it. They seem to bond through this, when there is no real substance to it, and I feel inferior when I'm with 2 or more of them at a time.
Throughout our relationship small annoyances like this have been minor issues compared to how happy we've been, even when I was abroad. Lately it's started getting to me more because I feel like he just wants someone to make him feel like he's an acceptable partner and it doesn't matter that it's me. Like I'm just something here to boost his ego and go along with whatever he wants. I find myself trying to be more like he wants me to be, and then I feel bad like I'm letting him manipulate me into something I wouldn't be otherwise.
The problem is that I get annoyed at him and I don't know whether it's because he is not listening to me and being socially weird, or I'm perceiving it wrong. It doesn't help that other things are stressing me out, but it feels like the relationship is beginning to take too much effort from me, and just making me feel rubbish in return. I've forgotten what made me like him so much in the first place, but the idea of breaking up is really painful. I don't know whether It's worth holding on or whether it's going to keep making me feel bad. I don't know whether the Christmas holidays away from him will help, or whether I'll just feel rubbish all Christmas about him. Sometimes other people's perspectives help me see situations better, so do you think this is something we can get through or something that will just keep going downhill?
Since I got back to England I've felt like he loves the sound of his own voice a bit too much. Like he doesn't even consider that I might already know what he's telling me, or whether he told me exactly the same thing a week ago. I know he doesn't mean to do it, but it as if he gets a subconscious kick from it, like he thinks he sounds clever and enjoys the feeling that I'll find it really interesting. We used to have really great discussions, but now I feel like it barely even matters what I say, he just likes whatever's going on in his own mind.
His group of friends(who I used to hang round with a bit) all play TF2(an fps), and I gave it a go a few years back but gave up after a while because I wasn't really enjoying it. They have all this banter about their internet memes and quotes from funny youtube gaming videos, which they repeat so many times to each other, and have such a big laugh about it. They seem to bond through this, when there is no real substance to it, and I feel inferior when I'm with 2 or more of them at a time.
Throughout our relationship small annoyances like this have been minor issues compared to how happy we've been, even when I was abroad. Lately it's started getting to me more because I feel like he just wants someone to make him feel like he's an acceptable partner and it doesn't matter that it's me. Like I'm just something here to boost his ego and go along with whatever he wants. I find myself trying to be more like he wants me to be, and then I feel bad like I'm letting him manipulate me into something I wouldn't be otherwise.
The problem is that I get annoyed at him and I don't know whether it's because he is not listening to me and being socially weird, or I'm perceiving it wrong. It doesn't help that other things are stressing me out, but it feels like the relationship is beginning to take too much effort from me, and just making me feel rubbish in return. I've forgotten what made me like him so much in the first place, but the idea of breaking up is really painful. I don't know whether It's worth holding on or whether it's going to keep making me feel bad. I don't know whether the Christmas holidays away from him will help, or whether I'll just feel rubbish all Christmas about him. Sometimes other people's perspectives help me see situations better, so do you think this is something we can get through or something that will just keep going downhill?
Put the internet to work for you.
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