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My story...you aint gonna like me

Hello
I am a happily married 36 year old woman, 3 kids.
Have been married for 10 years...my hubby is wonderful, my best friend, sex is very good and frequent...he wants it a bit more than me lol

My story began 6 months ago, when I came back to work after recuperating from my third C-section. I work at a large manufacturing company, in the engineering office. There is a man, he is 55, married, works in the shop. He looks a bit like Sam Elliots character in Roadhouse but less scraggly, more muscular, and NO limp...I am short, petite...cute but I wouldnt say hot

He (well call him Sam) and I were friends up until I came back, at that point he started flirting heavily with me. I didnt know what changed but I liked it. AFter about 2 months he got very very touchy feely and I did NOT put a stop to it...it got me very hot...and still me and my hubby are doing great

At the 4 month mark, I was out in the shop...and he cornered me and made an advance...we made out and he went down on me. It was the most incredible experience of my life...not because he was so good, but because it was so bad...so out of character for me

Since then we have been hot n heavy...only at work...the fascility is HUGE, and easy to find spots to do it...this has not changed my relationship with hubby at all, if anything I am more sexual

I had my tubes tied at last c section so no pregnancy chance...he is not the type to spread disease...he is technology illiterate so no facebook, texting...he doesnt have my number...

I have been lurkinh here for a while and read a lot about how cheaters typiavlly get caught, ive learned to hide it...

The ONLY two people who know are my 2 besties...they are my angel and devil on my shoulder LOL...at first the angel was horrified but now they seem to be living vicariously through me...to the point ive stopped talking about my lover with them

I wanted to talk to people I dont know...who will be brutally honest and help me figure out why I am caught up in this...I aint in love, its just exciting and raw...dirty...

are ALL cheaters horrible evil scum destined to live forever alone, or can this be something secret...something just mine...temporary...I dont feel guilty...I put unhappy in my name because i know eventually this affair has to end...

I get NOTHING emotional from Sam...once he got my undies down around my ankle he stopped the bullcrap courting and sweet nothings and now its just sexual...

he will walk by my desk and say "paint room 2 oclock"
I will be there and he will let me in, lock the door, and take me...he is even rude, tells me to shut up...it is intoxicating

let me have it...

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