Hello all well to start this post I don't really know where to begin, but here goes.
My sister has been married for about 15 years. About three years ago he cheated on her. She forgave him and he became ill last year with advanced prostrate cancer. He can not work now with his illness.
She allows him now on face book as he is ill. I am wary as I believe he is only acting like he is a changed man now as he has this serious illness.
He wrote a post saying this ...
Wishing my wife happy anniversary 15 years and I love her more now than ever. A true partner friend and lover she knows me more than I know myself supports me more than anyone would ever know and puts up with all my problems and pains bless her what would I do without her. We have had ups and downs but she is truly special and I love her dearly.
I will explain more in depth about this story so you all know everything about my worries and concerns.
He has been married twice before he married my sister. The first wife he was married to for 15 years and he cheated on her with his brother's wife. The wife left him after finding out for another woman. I don't know of any other occasions he may have cheated more than once on that wife?
He then got married for a second time to a first cousin. She was much younger than him. He cheated on her he said as she never gave him much love and attention, he cheated on her with a close friend. She then later left him and yet again I do not know if this was the only occasion he cheated on her.
Three years later he met my sister they dated for three years before getting married. I found out also when they were engaged he had cheated on my sister with his ex girlfriend. She forgave him for cheating when they were engaged. My sister writes all over face book that she is in love with her husband, most days. Even though my sister writes on facebook that she is in love with her husband, I know a different story as she tells me everything. She finds it hard to trust him even now.
She had two daughters to previous man and he took them on at a young age. They think allot about him. They also write on facebook how much they love him. If you met him you would think that he could do no harm to anyone. As he is very quiet and he portrays he is a big softie.
About three years ago I found out from my sister that he had cheated on her with a younger girl, that affair went on for about two and half years. Whilst that was going on she was still writing how much she loved her husband all over facebook and acting like the marriage was fine. And they still did everything like a normal married couple would do. Why I am saying this I don't understand why he cheated on my sister when to me everything seemed like they had a good marriage? Anyways she found out he was having this affair with a younger girl and she told him to end it. He ended it but then he went back to his younger lover again, my sister found out about this and she threaten to leave him if he didn't stop contact. So he said that he would stop contact. Then I found out off a friend of mine that he had been sending emails to his ex lover saying that he could not talk at the minute because his wife would not let him, and could he talk later when she was less suspicious? He th en became redundant and my sister had to go find work. Then six months later he become ill. Now she allows him to use facebook as before she did not let him use it, as she was wary about him cheating on her again. Now since he became ill he writes how much he loves her and how amazing she is. I don't know if he stopped cheating because he got sick and could no longer cheat, because he now has to rely on my sister, as he is too ill to cheat now. He is a very charming man he knows what to say on all occasions so how do you believe this man? He even blamed all of his ex wifes and lovers for the reasons why he cheated. He blamed my sister for him cheating with the younger girl. My sister didn't understand herself what she had done wrong because even whilst he was having his affair he kept up a normal marriage. I am sharing all of my sisters story as I still have doubts about him. I don't understand why he cheated on my sister on both occasions, my sister did say that she has sus picious that he has done it more than the times she has caught him. She knows I am writing this post as we share everything.
I care about my sister very much and I don't like to think that he is taking her for a fool again. All I want to see is my sister happy and I think that he is only like this now because he has no other choice.
Please will you give me your views on this subject, and if anyone has had a similar experience?
Thanks everyone for taking your time and reading my post and giving your opinions.
My sister's children real father does not bother with them. So he took them on as his own. They always go to him for advice but he has said to me on many occasions that they are too needy. And they always check up on him. I believe they do this because of him cheating.
My sister likes everyone to think they have a perfect marriage and a perfect little family. She could not bare to admit the truth to anyone else but me. I feel he is a deceitful man and this illness is the only thing that stops him from cheating. So his messages I think are what he thinks she needs to hear now. And this breaks my heart for her to be used. Do you agree or have a different view on this?
Hiya thank you all again for your comments. I know I should mind my own business its just so hard when I care for her so much. And it breaks my heart to see this. What upset me the other day she is working long hours he was at home posted on facebook he had cooked her this meal and a friend said isn't she so lucky to have you. He said yes she is lucky to have me I could not believe that comment. Then the next comment was but she is so special I thought to myself always blowing his own trumpet saying how great he is.
Also his illness he says he has no testosterone now and he had his lymph nodes removed and prostrate. They said his cancer has spread to other parts of his body and he is now on hormone replacement tablets.
Put the internet to work for you.
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