I haven't had time to read through the other posts, but needed to vent.
I haven't had sex with my husband in over a year now. I love my husband and we are great partners in almost everything, but our sex life and compatibility when it comes to that, is just non existent.
I feel like I hold back a lot, because I don't know what to do to please him. He got to where he couldn't get hard and he blamed it on meds and said he'd talk to his Dr, and said he did and they changed his meds, but he never really got back to trying to make it work with me. A couple of weekends ago I tried to initiate and he just laid there and said something to the effect that sex is just boring with us, always the same thing. He said he likes sex, I said I do too, we just don't work well together. He asked if I'd consider a threesome. I told him that doesn't really usually end up going well. He said "Sure it does." I asked if that meant he had someone in mind already? He said no, I could choose. (and I know he means whether man or woman - I don't think he'd care) I didn't know what to say and was silent. ((Just trying to take it in)) He just said "Well, guess that was it for our big talk." SO - that killed the mood of me trying anything, I felt like he didn't want me touching him and I stopped.
Now it's a couple weeks later. I've noticed on the cell phone bill that he's been constantly texting with a few women almost every day. (for at least 6 months) I just don't know what to do. Do I go against my comfort level and consider doing a three way for him or do I suggest an open marriage if I know he's not going to be happy with me? I'm afraid of making it alone and I really don't want a divorce. I'm just really torn. I DO miss being desired. I know he loves me, but I"m just not sure he's IN love with me any more.
I just want to cry.
I haven't had sex with my husband in over a year now. I love my husband and we are great partners in almost everything, but our sex life and compatibility when it comes to that, is just non existent.
I feel like I hold back a lot, because I don't know what to do to please him. He got to where he couldn't get hard and he blamed it on meds and said he'd talk to his Dr, and said he did and they changed his meds, but he never really got back to trying to make it work with me. A couple of weekends ago I tried to initiate and he just laid there and said something to the effect that sex is just boring with us, always the same thing. He said he likes sex, I said I do too, we just don't work well together. He asked if I'd consider a threesome. I told him that doesn't really usually end up going well. He said "Sure it does." I asked if that meant he had someone in mind already? He said no, I could choose. (and I know he means whether man or woman - I don't think he'd care) I didn't know what to say and was silent. ((Just trying to take it in)) He just said "Well, guess that was it for our big talk." SO - that killed the mood of me trying anything, I felt like he didn't want me touching him and I stopped.
Now it's a couple weeks later. I've noticed on the cell phone bill that he's been constantly texting with a few women almost every day. (for at least 6 months) I just don't know what to do. Do I go against my comfort level and consider doing a three way for him or do I suggest an open marriage if I know he's not going to be happy with me? I'm afraid of making it alone and I really don't want a divorce. I'm just really torn. I DO miss being desired. I know he loves me, but I"m just not sure he's IN love with me any more.
I just want to cry.
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