Hey,
Okay I'll get straight into the problem.
Me and my boyfriend have been together since November 2012 and have lived together for 7 months. He's 22 and I'm 2 weeks shy of 20. I moved for uni and he came with me and is studying at college.We live in a rented flat.
He moved from his hometown because he had a problem with marijuana - his friends and him smoked it every day and got nothing done so he moved to stop smoking it and be more productive with his life. I am anti drugs because in a previous relationship my ex used it and became very abusive towards me.
When we first got together I said the only reasons I would dump him were if he cheated on me or used drugs. Everything was fine at first.
However, he then started to use it whenever he visited his home town. Then whenever he visited friends in my home town. Now in our new town he has found friends who use it and does it with them. He came home the other night stinking of it and brushed his teeth straight away. When confronted, he lied and said his friends were using it, explaining the smell. Then he admitted he used it after further prompting.
I also pay all the bills, buy all the food, lend him money to get to college because his his job doesn't pay too much. He used to always ask his parents for money when we lived in my home town, now he asks me. He has made no effort to get a new job, even though I have spoken to him about it before. Whenever I say he needs to start pulling his weight financially he gets upset and talks about getting a payday loan which would completely ruin his finances. I am from a very low income family (father disabled, mums his carer) - I am a student but have an okay paying part time job but I am struggling now dealing with both of our finances. His mummy and daddy always bailed him out of financial difficulties - I don't have that and I'm worried.
He's also just generally not a very lovely person like he was when we first got together - hes moody and snappy and has angry mood swings. But sometimes he is amazing and caring and thoughtful... Its hard because if he wasn't very nice all the time my decision would be easier. We never have sex anymore.
We have to start thinking about resigning our tenancy agreement... I'm not sure I want to live with him for another year though. I don't think I want to split up but if we did but we weren't tied together financially it would be easier. But sometimes he is the man I fell in love with again :( I stress about going home sometimes because I don't know how he'll treat me or what frame of mind he'll be in.
Any advice??? I have no idea what to do.
1. Stay living with him for another year although there's a real possibility we wont stay together.
2. Move into separate places and stay together.
3. Move into separate places and break up...
Gah! It's so hard when there are contracts and houses in the mix.
Okay I'll get straight into the problem.
Me and my boyfriend have been together since November 2012 and have lived together for 7 months. He's 22 and I'm 2 weeks shy of 20. I moved for uni and he came with me and is studying at college.We live in a rented flat.
He moved from his hometown because he had a problem with marijuana - his friends and him smoked it every day and got nothing done so he moved to stop smoking it and be more productive with his life. I am anti drugs because in a previous relationship my ex used it and became very abusive towards me.
When we first got together I said the only reasons I would dump him were if he cheated on me or used drugs. Everything was fine at first.
However, he then started to use it whenever he visited his home town. Then whenever he visited friends in my home town. Now in our new town he has found friends who use it and does it with them. He came home the other night stinking of it and brushed his teeth straight away. When confronted, he lied and said his friends were using it, explaining the smell. Then he admitted he used it after further prompting.
I also pay all the bills, buy all the food, lend him money to get to college because his his job doesn't pay too much. He used to always ask his parents for money when we lived in my home town, now he asks me. He has made no effort to get a new job, even though I have spoken to him about it before. Whenever I say he needs to start pulling his weight financially he gets upset and talks about getting a payday loan which would completely ruin his finances. I am from a very low income family (father disabled, mums his carer) - I am a student but have an okay paying part time job but I am struggling now dealing with both of our finances. His mummy and daddy always bailed him out of financial difficulties - I don't have that and I'm worried.
He's also just generally not a very lovely person like he was when we first got together - hes moody and snappy and has angry mood swings. But sometimes he is amazing and caring and thoughtful... Its hard because if he wasn't very nice all the time my decision would be easier. We never have sex anymore.
We have to start thinking about resigning our tenancy agreement... I'm not sure I want to live with him for another year though. I don't think I want to split up but if we did but we weren't tied together financially it would be easier. But sometimes he is the man I fell in love with again :( I stress about going home sometimes because I don't know how he'll treat me or what frame of mind he'll be in.
Any advice??? I have no idea what to do.
1. Stay living with him for another year although there's a real possibility we wont stay together.
2. Move into separate places and stay together.
3. Move into separate places and break up...
Gah! It's so hard when there are contracts and houses in the mix.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment