Trying to save what's left

I want to preface this by saying that I am the WS. My husband has been here since DDay and I have lurked just about as long, only joining a few days ago, tryin to get up the courage to post hoping for some advice/help of my own. This site has been a huge help to him... I have had 6 online EAs involving txts as well as pics, and 1 EA/PA in a span of 2 years before DDay. After DDay, I had made promises that I would do ANYTHING to make us 'work' if he would just give me that chance. He did give me that chance. Several times. And each time, I broke promises, and TT'ed him to death. Ive put him through hell. By the time I was done TTing, Ive put everything out there, and kept promises, he gave me one last shot. But in this last chance, he is very uncertain, and rightfully so. Not only was I lying to him during the cheating, but EVERY oppertunity he gave me to come clean, I threw away. I do not blame him for feeling the way that he does. I am EXTREMELY thankful that he is giving me this day by day. To make matters worse, the OM finally contacted him to confirm what I have told him to be the truth, only his 'version' is slightly off than mine, and honestly not true. Unfortunetly, with all my previous lies and TT, BS has a hard time believeing stil l that I AM being truthful. And again, I truely understand that. I don't know what else I can do to prove myself that there is nothing more that I am trying to hide, that there isnt any little tidbit that he isnt aware of, that I am honestly commited to doing everything I can to show him that I have changed, will continue to change, and that I will do whatever I need to do to prevent this from ever happening again. That he, our marriage, and our family is what I am commited to fixing, because I know it can be done. I know this is a very VERY condensed version of whats happened. I will answer any questions the best I can.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979