Increasing penis sensitivity / intercourse sensation?

Looking for some real world, PRACTICAL methods for increasing penile sensitivity. By "practical" I mean I'd really rather not forego masturbation. I'm in my late 40's, and have changed nothing there as far as frequency or "force". I do use lubrication when masturbating. This has not changed. Frequency has not changed. What has changed is my sensitivity. And now it is "getting in my head", and distracting me even more. I do not see abstaining from masturbation as a viable solution. First...I know I won't. Second, we both enjoy it too much (me...both alone and when we're together, and for her, when she watches me) to give up what is some really great "spice" for us. I've tried to stay "hands off" for all but intercourse or oral with her. And it's just too damned tough. While it seems to help, slightly, with intercourse, the frustration over going a week or so without any orgasm just so I'm "hyper horny" leaves me entirely too flustered most days. Work is harder to concentrate on. Sleeping is much more difficult. I'm generally just in a crankier mood. And to be very honest, I guess I resent it...that I should have to go "without" because she hasn't put effort into exercises (she admitted as much). But here's the issue...I know I've lost sensitivity. Coupled with the fact the W is not the tightest, and it makes intercourse, oftentimes, a LOT of work, requiring a lot of focus, just to complete. If anything goes "off" (get too hot...get distracted in the slightest), I can't complete. I know her "tightness" is a bit of an issue for me...always has been I suppose, but lately, well, the "job" just isn't getting "done". I'd mentioned it to her as gently as I could, once, a few years ago. She took it hard. I imagine it's akin to being told you have a small penis...only worse, since she seemed to equate that issue to the fact she had a hysterectomy (which for a while made her feel "less a woman"...total bullchit, we all know...but I hated making her think that way. She did kegals for a couple weeks, and then stopped I guess. I think I noticed a slight improvement, very slight, but that has since waned. It has gotten bad enough that for the first time in our marriage, I am avoiding sex. It's not that she's unwilling, or has EVER given me a moment's flak about sex (in fact she initiates as much or more than I do, and has only "turned me down" to the tune of maybe a couple times a year), it's just that I know, that when we start, I'm in for a 30 minute minimum, working my azz off, sweating, and everything MUST be just "right" to finish phuck fest. And we both love that...sometimes. But every time? Dammit, it is a lot of work! I never feel that "oh crap...stop! I'm gonna cum too soon" sensation as I did before her. Never had to "think of other things" because it felt so good and wanted to delay orgasm. Now it is a very slowly building thing to where it is just a relief to be able to cum. I'm just not FEELING as much. And it is so frustrating. Frustrating enough lately that I'm avoiding sex. And for us, that SUCKS. We've never been like that. And we love to have sex together (but for me, this issue). I had my T tested last week. Came in at 380. Not optimal by any means, but not low enough to justify replacement therapy. Part of it is her "tightness". I've been extremely reluctant to approach her about this again...but may be able to now, because... Because, part of it is my sensitivity. I want to find ways to both increase that AND increase the sensations I get during PIV and oral (even oral has been a little more difficult for me lately). So, she knows I'm having issues, and my T is not optimal. I believe, presented to her as THAT, as in "my issue", if we discuss ways for her to do exercises to tighten things, it may be much less an issue for her if it is "not her", but rather "my issue". You know..."hey babe, I'm having problems...and I want to work towards solutions and have a plan on what I need to do...can you help me as well?" I don't know. I'm in fair shape, but want to drop about 15 lbs. There was a time about 5 years ago where my sensitivity went through the roof. I couldn't believe it. I felt like I was 18 again. And I couldn't figure it out...until now I think. I'd given up smoking 5 years before that, so I doubt it took that long for that to have an effect. What I think did change about that time, was I was likely in the best shape of my life for about 6 months (before I had a knee injury). Looking back...I think the timing is about right. But I'm not sure. I didn't put it together at the time. I'm sure being in great shape and carrying around 15 fewer pounds also increased my T levels at the time, and maybe that was it. But, to do so again will take time. So, in the meantime....any recommendations? I've read about a "lotion" called "man1 man" that seems to increase sensitivity. Also, some mention of treating the "area" with vitamin E lotion or women's facial creams. I've also read a little on yohimbe, which is reported to help. Guys...give it up. Tried any of this, and did it work? I've got a woman that loves to phuck my brains out. I want to love doing it again. I want to feel her.

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