Long story

My husband and I have been together for 34 years. Recently, I spent over half of our savings and lied to him about the account balance to cover it up. 4 months ago he went to the bank, made a withdrawel and found out the account was way short of what I had told him. I told him that I had been spending it. He was furious and I don't blame him. He told me things would be different. He immediately took over all of the finances. I just recently underwent cancer treatment and had a follow up appointment out of town. He wanted me to tell one of the counselors why I didn't seem to be happy about the prospects of surviving cancer - so I did. He made a diffinitive statement to her - "It's over between us. I am moving on." That was the first I had heard about it. I was crushed, even more. Then, 4 days after that I get a phone call from a shirttail relative (not in blood, but in marriage). She proceeds to tell me that my husband told her that there had been no love in our relationship for over 10 years-again that was the first time I had heard this. Meanwhile, my husband and I are continuing on in a very hurt and cold manner. Then he tells me he is done with me forever and will be dating other women, the first of which is the shirttail relative, who he had already been dating. He said that we would continue to stay married, and that I could have the house and widows pension and I would still be entitled to the health insurance. He said that as long as he was able to date the shirttail, he would stay and we could kinda hang out, since I was willing to help him try to recoup the money I spent. I hurt him badly, lost him, apparently many years ago, and I am suffering horribly over all of it. Whenever he talks to the shirttail, I do my best not to be anywhere around. He realized that it was killing me when he talked to his girlfriend while I was around and now has decided it would be best if he moves out and closer to her. If it's possible, I am crushed some more. I have and will always love him. I don't want to live without him or share him. I understand that I don't deserve him anymore. I guess what I need most is Prayers.

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