I'm 19 and at uni, he's 25 and working. We've been together for a wonderful 6 months. We love each other more than i thought imaginable and we are certain that each other is "the one".
This weekend, he got drunk and revealed to me that when he was 19, he had a one night stand with a girl and has a five year old daughter as a result. He hasn't seen her in years and has tried to contact the mother, but she doesn't let him see her anymore.
I have never been so heartbroken in my life. Most girls would be able to deal with the news that their boyfriend has a baby but this news is causing me so much pain. He always told me that I was the most beautiful girl in the world and he would love me more than anything - I now know this can never be true because one day, he will start seeing his daughter again, and he will think that of her, and I will come second. A little bit of me doesn't want that to happen, but I know it has to because she is his baby, and that little girl is going to need her daddy.
He said he didn't tell me to protect me and he didn't want him having a baby to change how much i loved him or felt about him, but i feel so betrayed that he didn't tell me- I feel like i don't know him anymore.
The pain this is causing me is giving me a constant feeling of nausea, I haven't eaten in days and have constantly been crying because I now know the life i wanted of marriage, babies and maybe living somewhere like Hawaii has changed because at 19, i'm a step-mum and my boyfriend is always going to have to put her first. If i'd have known this at the beginning, I would not have convinced myself that would be the life I was going have.
I have considered leaving him to save more heartache in the future, but I love him too much.
How would you deal with my situation?
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment