I've gotten a lot of good advice in previous posts and my wife and I are communication better. She's actually waking up earlier, is doing a lot of housework and is seeming happier. She's hasn't been drinking on her meds and is changing some others.
We are communicating much better as well. She knows that I'm having issues with the frequency of sex. I think she wants to work on it, but I'm trying to find a way.
So I'm logical, I've been Googling and I read about he 30-day sex challenge. So I'm looking at it as... Yay! I may have sex for 30-days. So I have sufficient motivation to try. But, at the same time, I'm biased towards anything that gives me more sex. So maybe it's not the best idea or there may be unintended consequences?
Here's why I think it may be beneficial and applicable to our relationship. First, we are in a lull and I think my own resentments are growing. We haven't had sex in 3 weeks. My wife doesn't think sex is a priority(her words), but when we do have sex, she enjoys it. It took a few years for us to figure it out, but she does orgasm.
The idea of requiring it, will force some scheduling. Not having time or it being the wrong time seems to always be the issue. If it's required we have to make time.
In addition, it seems like we both want intimacy, but we both have difficulty getting from here to there. Now, my idea of intimacy may end in sex, but after asking her what her idea of intimacy is, it's very similar to mine. In fact, if we used her definition for intimacy, and practiced it, we'd have more sex. In other words, intimacy doesn't rule out sex, it prepares for it. She may deny that, but if I give her her idea of intimacy, she'll be wanting it. But, I get rejected for trying either.
It's really embarrassing for me to have to ask tips on how to get more sex from my wife. It feels self-serving. But, at this point, I think I just have to say it's important to me. I think my wife is attractive, and probably like every other guy I think about my alone time with her all day long. It's when it comes, and doesn't turn out like I expected that I start questioning things.
So I guess the question is (and I already suggested it to her)whether the 30-day challenge is a good idea. Or is asking for 2-years worth of sex too far too fast? Should I go for the 1-day sex challenge first?:scratchhead:
We are communicating much better as well. She knows that I'm having issues with the frequency of sex. I think she wants to work on it, but I'm trying to find a way.
So I'm logical, I've been Googling and I read about he 30-day sex challenge. So I'm looking at it as... Yay! I may have sex for 30-days. So I have sufficient motivation to try. But, at the same time, I'm biased towards anything that gives me more sex. So maybe it's not the best idea or there may be unintended consequences?
Here's why I think it may be beneficial and applicable to our relationship. First, we are in a lull and I think my own resentments are growing. We haven't had sex in 3 weeks. My wife doesn't think sex is a priority(her words), but when we do have sex, she enjoys it. It took a few years for us to figure it out, but she does orgasm.
The idea of requiring it, will force some scheduling. Not having time or it being the wrong time seems to always be the issue. If it's required we have to make time.
In addition, it seems like we both want intimacy, but we both have difficulty getting from here to there. Now, my idea of intimacy may end in sex, but after asking her what her idea of intimacy is, it's very similar to mine. In fact, if we used her definition for intimacy, and practiced it, we'd have more sex. In other words, intimacy doesn't rule out sex, it prepares for it. She may deny that, but if I give her her idea of intimacy, she'll be wanting it. But, I get rejected for trying either.
It's really embarrassing for me to have to ask tips on how to get more sex from my wife. It feels self-serving. But, at this point, I think I just have to say it's important to me. I think my wife is attractive, and probably like every other guy I think about my alone time with her all day long. It's when it comes, and doesn't turn out like I expected that I start questioning things.
So I guess the question is (and I already suggested it to her)whether the 30-day challenge is a good idea. Or is asking for 2-years worth of sex too far too fast? Should I go for the 1-day sex challenge first?:scratchhead:
Put the internet to work for you.
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