SAD STORY ABOUT TRACY
Names have been changed and events have been summarized but it is a true story.
Tracy was my university classmate. Tracy got into one of the top MBA programs in the US . Tracy decided to marry Charlie before moving to the US . They went using visas so Charlie cannot work; as a result, Tracy 's family supported this couple financially for two years.
Tracy worked for an investment bank after MBA and was posted in New York and Singapore . Charlie was neither a citizen of the US nor Singapore and did not worked when they lived there. As a result, Charlie stayed home and looked after their two daughters for several years. Eventually, Tracy was posted back to their home town, Hong Kong .
Tracy worked hard and they were financially stable. But with only one income, they did not have much savings. When buying a home in Hong Kong for the family, Tracy 's parents had to help with the down payment.
Around this time, the internet industry was growing rapidly and Tracy decided to quit the bank and started a website on early childhood development and education. Although successful, it was not profitable and finding a buyer was difficult after the internet bubble. With dwindling personal savings, Tracy reluctantly closed the website.
At this time, Tracy wanted to spend more time with their children and decided to take a few years off to take care of them. Tracy planned to go back to school while caring for the children, and then return to work when they are older. Over the next few years, Tracy focused on taking care of the children and provided them with a healthy and nurturing environment. During this time, Tracy also completed two masters and a doctoral degree.
Charlie started to work when Tracy stayed home with the children. However, Charlie asserted that income was low and cannot contribute financially. As a result, not only did Tracy look after the children full time, Tracy also support the family financially despite not having a job nor income. After work, Charlie would just come home for dinner, watch television, and then go to bed; there was not much contribution of any sort. Recently during the divorce, Tracy found out that Charlie always had decent income; just most were spent by Charlie on personal purchases, toys, and investments and not much left for the family.
Three years ago, Tracy 's older daughter was having trouble at school and Tracy wanted to send her to the US to complete high school. Charlie objected and argued that they should ignore her problems and let her sort things out herself. But Tracy did not want to give up on their older daughter and decided to send her to the US for school. Tracy 's younger daughter was an exceptional scholar and athlete, and Tracy also sent her to school in the US last year for a better educational environment. To Tracy 's delight, both daughters had grown into exceptional students and independent mature young adults since they went to school in the US .
After taking care of the family for so many years, Tracy has no savings but lots of debt from the mortgage, supporting the family over the last two decades, and paying for the children's education. Tracy has one full time and two part time jobs just to stay afloat and Tracy is worrying about the children's tuition in the coming years. Tracy wants a divorce from Charlie to stop the freeloading and freeriding so that Tracy can focus on paying off her debt and taking care of the children. Tracy also wants to sell the family home to ensure that funds are available for the children to complete their education.
HOWEVER, this is what greedy Charlie wants for the divorce.
(a) Charlie wants the family home free and clear BUT wants Tracy to be responsible for the mortgage debt and continue paying for it.
(b) Charlie wants Tracy to pay a monthly allowance which is more than Tracy's monthly income in order to rent yet another home and to cover all the family expenses (Charlie's and the children's) AND wants Tracy to be responsible for all the outstanding debt incurred to support the whole family in the past years.
(c) Charlie wants full custody of the children BUT wants Tracy to pay for all the children's education expenses in the future so that Charlie will not let them drop out of school and return to Hong Kong.
Tracy thought:
"Are these unreasonable demands a penalty for my willingness to step up and take care of the whole family all these years when you are not willing? What should I do?"
Names have been changed and events have been summarized but it is a true story.
Tracy was my university classmate. Tracy got into one of the top MBA programs in the US . Tracy decided to marry Charlie before moving to the US . They went using visas so Charlie cannot work; as a result, Tracy 's family supported this couple financially for two years.
Tracy worked for an investment bank after MBA and was posted in New York and Singapore . Charlie was neither a citizen of the US nor Singapore and did not worked when they lived there. As a result, Charlie stayed home and looked after their two daughters for several years. Eventually, Tracy was posted back to their home town, Hong Kong .
Tracy worked hard and they were financially stable. But with only one income, they did not have much savings. When buying a home in Hong Kong for the family, Tracy 's parents had to help with the down payment.
Around this time, the internet industry was growing rapidly and Tracy decided to quit the bank and started a website on early childhood development and education. Although successful, it was not profitable and finding a buyer was difficult after the internet bubble. With dwindling personal savings, Tracy reluctantly closed the website.
At this time, Tracy wanted to spend more time with their children and decided to take a few years off to take care of them. Tracy planned to go back to school while caring for the children, and then return to work when they are older. Over the next few years, Tracy focused on taking care of the children and provided them with a healthy and nurturing environment. During this time, Tracy also completed two masters and a doctoral degree.
Charlie started to work when Tracy stayed home with the children. However, Charlie asserted that income was low and cannot contribute financially. As a result, not only did Tracy look after the children full time, Tracy also support the family financially despite not having a job nor income. After work, Charlie would just come home for dinner, watch television, and then go to bed; there was not much contribution of any sort. Recently during the divorce, Tracy found out that Charlie always had decent income; just most were spent by Charlie on personal purchases, toys, and investments and not much left for the family.
Three years ago, Tracy 's older daughter was having trouble at school and Tracy wanted to send her to the US to complete high school. Charlie objected and argued that they should ignore her problems and let her sort things out herself. But Tracy did not want to give up on their older daughter and decided to send her to the US for school. Tracy 's younger daughter was an exceptional scholar and athlete, and Tracy also sent her to school in the US last year for a better educational environment. To Tracy 's delight, both daughters had grown into exceptional students and independent mature young adults since they went to school in the US .
After taking care of the family for so many years, Tracy has no savings but lots of debt from the mortgage, supporting the family over the last two decades, and paying for the children's education. Tracy has one full time and two part time jobs just to stay afloat and Tracy is worrying about the children's tuition in the coming years. Tracy wants a divorce from Charlie to stop the freeloading and freeriding so that Tracy can focus on paying off her debt and taking care of the children. Tracy also wants to sell the family home to ensure that funds are available for the children to complete their education.
HOWEVER, this is what greedy Charlie wants for the divorce.
(a) Charlie wants the family home free and clear BUT wants Tracy to be responsible for the mortgage debt and continue paying for it.
(b) Charlie wants Tracy to pay a monthly allowance which is more than Tracy's monthly income in order to rent yet another home and to cover all the family expenses (Charlie's and the children's) AND wants Tracy to be responsible for all the outstanding debt incurred to support the whole family in the past years.
(c) Charlie wants full custody of the children BUT wants Tracy to pay for all the children's education expenses in the future so that Charlie will not let them drop out of school and return to Hong Kong.
Tracy thought:
"Are these unreasonable demands a penalty for my willingness to step up and take care of the whole family all these years when you are not willing? What should I do?"
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