Hello everyone I need some advice. I have been married for 2 years now. I moved to a new city after I got married for my husband as he has a good paying job. I have been looking for opportunities for a year now after my contract ended in my last job and I haven't been able to find anything. As I don't have any family here and few and far in between friends it us very difficult to not make my husband the center if my life. He grew up here and has many high school friends who live close by and his parents, grandparents. Anyways I need some advice on this situation:
- When my husband and I fight on thurs and there is some mean words being thrown, I get hurt, eventually he wants to make up but I don't and we go to sleep... Next day (fri)all day I am looking for jobs at a cafe(that's what I do everyday) he goes to work. I make an effort to talk to him when he comes home and he talks back and things are civil with some tension still. But then he says he is going out with a friend for the night (730-12am) for a few beers at a local bar. He doesn't come home drunk. He tells me before he goes but it is also my Friday and he knows I feel lonely and depressed to be home alone. I am alone all day and have no friends who I can text impromptu for happy hour etc. my few friends here live in the city as we are in suburbs (20 mins in car) and they are not so close that I can just text immediate for drinks. I have told him repeatedly to not do this last min make plans and leave me alone. If he wants to hang out once in a while with friends the n make plans a day before so I know and am prepared. He doesn't do this after every fight but once in a while he will. I feel so lonely and he knows this yet he is so selfish and uncaring that he does it anyway. It's not like he needs to get space cause we both were angry at each other and he was the one who wanted to make up and move on. It's not like I did st wrong and he got angry and wanted to leave the house to get space. There is a way to hang out with his friends and knowing my situation I feel he is very selfish and uncaring towards my predicament. I feel very sad when he leaves. I think there is st wrong with me. Am I too clingy? Am I overly being selfish? I let him hang out w friends alone once in a whole or take boy trips but all I ask is he not do it last min like this just cause we are not lovey dovey and had a fight the night before.
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- When my husband and I fight on thurs and there is some mean words being thrown, I get hurt, eventually he wants to make up but I don't and we go to sleep... Next day (fri)all day I am looking for jobs at a cafe(that's what I do everyday) he goes to work. I make an effort to talk to him when he comes home and he talks back and things are civil with some tension still. But then he says he is going out with a friend for the night (730-12am) for a few beers at a local bar. He doesn't come home drunk. He tells me before he goes but it is also my Friday and he knows I feel lonely and depressed to be home alone. I am alone all day and have no friends who I can text impromptu for happy hour etc. my few friends here live in the city as we are in suburbs (20 mins in car) and they are not so close that I can just text immediate for drinks. I have told him repeatedly to not do this last min make plans and leave me alone. If he wants to hang out once in a while with friends the n make plans a day before so I know and am prepared. He doesn't do this after every fight but once in a while he will. I feel so lonely and he knows this yet he is so selfish and uncaring that he does it anyway. It's not like he needs to get space cause we both were angry at each other and he was the one who wanted to make up and move on. It's not like I did st wrong and he got angry and wanted to leave the house to get space. There is a way to hang out with his friends and knowing my situation I feel he is very selfish and uncaring towards my predicament. I feel very sad when he leaves. I think there is st wrong with me. Am I too clingy? Am I overly being selfish? I let him hang out w friends alone once in a whole or take boy trips but all I ask is he not do it last min like this just cause we are not lovey dovey and had a fight the night before.
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