Hi
I'm married 10 years, my husband is often out late ie. till 2, 3 and even till 4 am in the mornings, drinking and at different pubs. In the last few months he has not come home at all 3x and only come back close to lunch time the next day, leaving the night before at about 9.00 pm. When I phone he sometimes doesn't answer his phone or gets a friend to answer and that person gives me some stupid story that he is in the loo. Or he tells me he is leaving now and he can hear I'm tearful on the phone because it's one o'clock in the morning and I'm just wishing he will come home. After an hour he still isn't home. When I phone again he says he's leaving and takes another hour before he comes home. There are times when he tells me he has just finished a job and just stopped off for one drink and I know he is lying, I know he finished hours ago. I've heard him swear me to his friends when he thought he had switched his phone off. This has been going on for about 4 years now, I've begged him to think about his marriage and asked him to stop carrying on like this, he says sorry and then next week does the same thing. I don't trust him because of his lying and of course because of staying out late and sometimes not coming home. He promises me there is no one but I don't know. There aren't any woman phoning or strange numbers ors sms's. I told him to stop or I'm leaving ,he hasn't begged me to stay or offered to get some help, his response is that he doesn't fit the mould that I have for him. But that's not the issue, I just want to be loved and respected and for him to treat me decently. Other married men who love their wives don't lie about their whereabouts, stay out till all hours or not come hom. I've told him if he is willing to have counseling with me and my daughter and go to AA we can save our marriage, he isn't commiting to this and says we will see. This weekend he is looking for a place because I'm moving out. I think I'm wanti ng to know am I being hasty, he may not want to be married once he lives on his own with so much freedom. I'v scared that I'm making it worse by moving out. All I want is for him to tell me he loves me so much that he is willing to doanything to make it work. All he says is he lost the plot along time ago and friends became more important and that he still loves me, but where is the action, why doesn't he do what he can to keep his marriage. He's not committing to stopping anything, only acknowledging. My 15 yr old :(:(daughter who is not his biological daughter hates him because she says he makes me cry and doesn't care how much he hurts me. Please help Sorry it's so long winded.
I'm married 10 years, my husband is often out late ie. till 2, 3 and even till 4 am in the mornings, drinking and at different pubs. In the last few months he has not come home at all 3x and only come back close to lunch time the next day, leaving the night before at about 9.00 pm. When I phone he sometimes doesn't answer his phone or gets a friend to answer and that person gives me some stupid story that he is in the loo. Or he tells me he is leaving now and he can hear I'm tearful on the phone because it's one o'clock in the morning and I'm just wishing he will come home. After an hour he still isn't home. When I phone again he says he's leaving and takes another hour before he comes home. There are times when he tells me he has just finished a job and just stopped off for one drink and I know he is lying, I know he finished hours ago. I've heard him swear me to his friends when he thought he had switched his phone off. This has been going on for about 4 years now, I've begged him to think about his marriage and asked him to stop carrying on like this, he says sorry and then next week does the same thing. I don't trust him because of his lying and of course because of staying out late and sometimes not coming home. He promises me there is no one but I don't know. There aren't any woman phoning or strange numbers ors sms's. I told him to stop or I'm leaving ,he hasn't begged me to stay or offered to get some help, his response is that he doesn't fit the mould that I have for him. But that's not the issue, I just want to be loved and respected and for him to treat me decently. Other married men who love their wives don't lie about their whereabouts, stay out till all hours or not come hom. I've told him if he is willing to have counseling with me and my daughter and go to AA we can save our marriage, he isn't commiting to this and says we will see. This weekend he is looking for a place because I'm moving out. I think I'm wanti ng to know am I being hasty, he may not want to be married once he lives on his own with so much freedom. I'v scared that I'm making it worse by moving out. All I want is for him to tell me he loves me so much that he is willing to doanything to make it work. All he says is he lost the plot along time ago and friends became more important and that he still loves me, but where is the action, why doesn't he do what he can to keep his marriage. He's not committing to stopping anything, only acknowledging. My 15 yr old :(:(daughter who is not his biological daughter hates him because she says he makes me cry and doesn't care how much he hurts me. Please help Sorry it's so long winded.
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