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:D British Asians: Do the relationship / general restrictions sometimes get you?

I know there's already a few threads directed at British Asians but it's a free forum so I'm posting another one!

I'm not one of these self-haters or anything but sometimes it annoys me that our society places so many restrictions on us. I know all societies judge others but I feel like ours particularly feels the need to interfere in other people's business and pass ignorant comments or spread rumors on the way another person chooses to live their life, especially if that person has adopted a more liberal lifestyle or does not adhere to certain societal rules for example: relationships before marriage / dress codes / behaviour (e.g. not going out to clubs / staying out late / drinking in a lot of cases)

I can understand that we are raised with a certain level of expectation and I'm not saying that I want to do all of the above but sometimes it gets to me. For example, when you choose a marital partner, generally you don't have much time to get to know them, it's a yes or no based on their appearance / status / and what you've heard about them in general i.e. whether they're of good character or not / religious. I also feel like girls just have to sit around and wait to be asked and the guy who asks you could be a perfectly decent human being but that does not necessarily mean that you're comfortable deciding whether or not you want to spend the rest of your life with that person. If anyone deviates from what is considered the 'norm' i.e. forms a relationship prior to marriage or forms a relationship with someone of a different religion / race, they're basically considered an immoral person and it's like a public embarrassment for their family and you will be looked down upon by your own society for the rest of your life.

It's hard to find any middle ground, I'm not as liberal as most white people I know but I'm not as conservative as most Asians I know, I'm just me and sometimes I feel like I'm rejected by both groups of people because I'm too white for the Asians and too Asian for the whites. I guess I just feel very isolated at times, there's no one that I can properly relate to.

I'm pretty sure there's more I want to say on this but I have an essay to finish so just leave your thoughts and hopefully I'll get back...

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