Hello y'all,*
I haven't posted in a long time, but I wanted to thank you for your support. I finally faced my truth--not only about my sexless marriage, but my goals, my home, everything in my life.
In December, I left my home and moved back to the South, where I'm from. My husband didn't stop me and paid for most of the move. Maybe he should have fought harder to keep me, but I believe he loved me enough to let me go. Our marriage aside, he knew I was unhappy where we lived and had only stayed for him.
However, I didn't 'leave him' right away. My move was partly a test to see how our relationship would fare with 2000 miles between us. It got better. When he wasn't faced with the day-to-day reality of marriage, my husband missed me. Immensely. Despite his physical issues, we had a satisfactory sexual experience--the first one in over a year--during the Christmas holidays. When he came to visit me for the first time seven weeks later (the longest we had ever been apart), we had the best sex, the kind we had when we were dating. So as I suspected, his lackluster sexual desire was not purely physical as he claimed, but a combination of both physical and psychological issues. One of our many therapists called it conquest theory. Even my so-called proof wasn't enough to push me over the edge. What finally did isn't important except I asked for a divorce three months ago.
I'll be 43 years old in less than two weeks. I'm starting a new chapter in my life, and financially, I'm starting over. I'm not going to lie--it's f****** scary. But sometimes, scary is necessary for change, and change is the only constant in life.
In fact, I met someone. I don't know if we have a future, but our first date, which lasted 50 hours, was the best. Simply the best. He's everything I wanted and more. He accepts me for who I am. Physically, we feel more compatible with each other than with anyone else in our lives. He's more than a decade older than me and doesn't have any physical issues that prevent him from making love to me for hours. If I had not moved here, we never would have met. Turns out, you're never too old to meet The One.
Best of luck to all you.
Sincerely,
No longer Yummy Girl.
Just call me Red.
*Practicing my Southern accent.
I haven't posted in a long time, but I wanted to thank you for your support. I finally faced my truth--not only about my sexless marriage, but my goals, my home, everything in my life.
In December, I left my home and moved back to the South, where I'm from. My husband didn't stop me and paid for most of the move. Maybe he should have fought harder to keep me, but I believe he loved me enough to let me go. Our marriage aside, he knew I was unhappy where we lived and had only stayed for him.
However, I didn't 'leave him' right away. My move was partly a test to see how our relationship would fare with 2000 miles between us. It got better. When he wasn't faced with the day-to-day reality of marriage, my husband missed me. Immensely. Despite his physical issues, we had a satisfactory sexual experience--the first one in over a year--during the Christmas holidays. When he came to visit me for the first time seven weeks later (the longest we had ever been apart), we had the best sex, the kind we had when we were dating. So as I suspected, his lackluster sexual desire was not purely physical as he claimed, but a combination of both physical and psychological issues. One of our many therapists called it conquest theory. Even my so-called proof wasn't enough to push me over the edge. What finally did isn't important except I asked for a divorce three months ago.
- I don't feel guilty.
- I don't feel too lonely.
- Mostly, I feel relieved. Because, I couldn't fix him. There was nothing more I could do to make things better.
I'll be 43 years old in less than two weeks. I'm starting a new chapter in my life, and financially, I'm starting over. I'm not going to lie--it's f****** scary. But sometimes, scary is necessary for change, and change is the only constant in life.
In fact, I met someone. I don't know if we have a future, but our first date, which lasted 50 hours, was the best. Simply the best. He's everything I wanted and more. He accepts me for who I am. Physically, we feel more compatible with each other than with anyone else in our lives. He's more than a decade older than me and doesn't have any physical issues that prevent him from making love to me for hours. If I had not moved here, we never would have met. Turns out, you're never too old to meet The One.
Best of luck to all you.
Sincerely,
No longer Yummy Girl.
Just call me Red.
*Practicing my Southern accent.
Put the internet to work for you.
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