The wifey and I have been married for 16 years and been together for 21. When we met, I had a little experience sexually, and she had pretty much 0 experience. She's always had trouble climaxing (I'd say she usually gets it 2/3 of the time), never had multiple O's (she gets mega sensitive when she's done, and doesn't want to try again), and always needs extra clitoral stimulation.
My first priority is getting her there. I can get off at will, so I'm not at all worried about myself. Frequency is not an issue. I feel like we are evenly matched there (3-5/week). I noticed in June that we were going at it a lot, so I kept track in July, and we got it on 17 times. For how inexperienced she was, she's down for a lot of things. She always says here favorite thing to do is give me a BJ. I'm all for it.
We had a few rough patches along the way. I've had a few periods where I was somewhat emotionally unavailable for her (stress of Kids and Life, etc...), where I just became very reserved and moody. Neither of us have or would cheat. My wife is honest to a fault, and has a fairly guilty conscience.
I really worked on myself and my issues over the winter and spring and in return we are at a very good place in our Marriage. My wife is always super positive, but she says she feels like our relationship is the best it's ever been. We love each other very much, and according to both of us, are very attracted to each other sexually. Plus, she is super hot. I know Hubbys are supposed to say that, but she really is. My friends always say how lucky I am.... Now on to my questions...
She barely gets an O anymore. Last night, I was down in South America doing work for twenty minutes (all this after 10-15 minutes of kissing and other foreplay) and couldn't get it going. Then manually, until my arm went numb- nothing. She gets right to the edge and can't go over... The thing is, she is not that frustrated. She says she knows she has always had a hard time, and she just enjoys the ride regardless. Me- I'm like WTF am I doing wrong? She's getting it around 20% of the time.
Am I/her putting too much pressure mentally on the end result? I know she feels bad because she knows how goal oriented I am in that regard. How jacked is that? She feels bad for me, because she is having difficulties O'ing... Haha..
I'm trying like hell not to show disappointment, because it only makes it worse, but I'm an easy read, so It's hard to hide. Last night, after I failed.. again.. I couldn't go to sleep, because I was thinking about everything, my neighbor's goat wouldn't shut up, my fat dogs were snoring louder than air raid alarm, it was hot, etc... So, I went and slept on the coach. Of course, this has a detrimental effect on my wife, because she thinks I'm mad at her.
I'm just confused, because according to her, this is the best we've been. lots of sex, lots of passion/kissing, etc.., but she's having a hard time getting there. I'm trying to not let it affect me, but it is. Of course, I do research on the interwebz and I land the threads where the internet studs talk about how they made their girl orgasm 937 times last night. So, I get that stuff going in my brain as well. Haha...
I feel like it really is a mental thing now. Any tips from some women who have this trouble/ or have had dry spells, etc?
Thanks in advance....
My first priority is getting her there. I can get off at will, so I'm not at all worried about myself. Frequency is not an issue. I feel like we are evenly matched there (3-5/week). I noticed in June that we were going at it a lot, so I kept track in July, and we got it on 17 times. For how inexperienced she was, she's down for a lot of things. She always says here favorite thing to do is give me a BJ. I'm all for it.
We had a few rough patches along the way. I've had a few periods where I was somewhat emotionally unavailable for her (stress of Kids and Life, etc...), where I just became very reserved and moody. Neither of us have or would cheat. My wife is honest to a fault, and has a fairly guilty conscience.
I really worked on myself and my issues over the winter and spring and in return we are at a very good place in our Marriage. My wife is always super positive, but she says she feels like our relationship is the best it's ever been. We love each other very much, and according to both of us, are very attracted to each other sexually. Plus, she is super hot. I know Hubbys are supposed to say that, but she really is. My friends always say how lucky I am.... Now on to my questions...
She barely gets an O anymore. Last night, I was down in South America doing work for twenty minutes (all this after 10-15 minutes of kissing and other foreplay) and couldn't get it going. Then manually, until my arm went numb- nothing. She gets right to the edge and can't go over... The thing is, she is not that frustrated. She says she knows she has always had a hard time, and she just enjoys the ride regardless. Me- I'm like WTF am I doing wrong? She's getting it around 20% of the time.
Am I/her putting too much pressure mentally on the end result? I know she feels bad because she knows how goal oriented I am in that regard. How jacked is that? She feels bad for me, because she is having difficulties O'ing... Haha..
I'm trying like hell not to show disappointment, because it only makes it worse, but I'm an easy read, so It's hard to hide. Last night, after I failed.. again.. I couldn't go to sleep, because I was thinking about everything, my neighbor's goat wouldn't shut up, my fat dogs were snoring louder than air raid alarm, it was hot, etc... So, I went and slept on the coach. Of course, this has a detrimental effect on my wife, because she thinks I'm mad at her.
I'm just confused, because according to her, this is the best we've been. lots of sex, lots of passion/kissing, etc.., but she's having a hard time getting there. I'm trying to not let it affect me, but it is. Of course, I do research on the interwebz and I land the threads where the internet studs talk about how they made their girl orgasm 937 times last night. So, I get that stuff going in my brain as well. Haha...
I feel like it really is a mental thing now. Any tips from some women who have this trouble/ or have had dry spells, etc?
Thanks in advance....
Put the internet to work for you.
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