I can not even believe that I am on a forum like this having his issue. I am totally blindsided as I am sure most are. On July 19th I caught my husband cheating on me. I woke to the shower on at 5:50 am. Something picked me up out of bed and I went to his phone. NEVER in 15 years of being together have I looked at his phone! It was like I was lead there and to my surprise I see him texting a friend. He was leaving to bring her coffee and a bagel and it said I can wait to give you a kiss. Needless to say I was seeing triple and tried to read up more and see all the flirting and talk and then he gets out of the shower within a minute. Never does he do that and comes running in. Everything just hit the fan after that. I texted her and said he would not be coming over and we just started the talking and crying phase of things. I am very thankful my oldest was away so we had a week just with my two younger ones to get through this. I have never been so broken in my life and he literally had to pick me up each day to try and focus on work etc.
I was SOOO angry but then just started praying. For some reason the anger turned into me wanting him more being there for him and him just holding me was the only thing that makes me feel okay.
He has been SOOO honest which is the part that is killing me more. He is not "in love" with me anymore but he loves me. That hurts that just melts me. For years we have had issues with just not having enough time for each other. We have 3 active kids going in a million directions we both work full time due to $ issues and by the time the night comes around I am exhausted. I will own up to no giving him enough but I have also asked him for so much to like time for us and to be alone. We have friends and family around everytime we do anything.
The not enough sex talks where only when he was drinking and just being mean. Never have we sat down sober and expressed our feelings. I should have reached out more and he should have too. In the big picture we have an amazing life and get along great.
I am dealing with being broken right now crying a lot trying to get myself together but I am so weak. He is here with me and talking with me but the honestly of him not loving me hurts. We are going to go to counseling he wants to try and work on things. He told me he has not spoke to her but he did think of her last week.
I am sure these are all normal emotions I just don't know where to go. Today I got up went to the gym and am trying to take care of me. I deserve to be loved 110% and need to remind myself of that. I am willing to pray, go to counseling and do whatever it takes but I wish he would chase me more. I will work at it and keep this family apart but only if he makes it happen.
Just broken a friend sent me here she said this saved her marriage so I am hoping to read positive stories and get encouragement from you all. Thank you for listening to my rambling
I was SOOO angry but then just started praying. For some reason the anger turned into me wanting him more being there for him and him just holding me was the only thing that makes me feel okay.
He has been SOOO honest which is the part that is killing me more. He is not "in love" with me anymore but he loves me. That hurts that just melts me. For years we have had issues with just not having enough time for each other. We have 3 active kids going in a million directions we both work full time due to $ issues and by the time the night comes around I am exhausted. I will own up to no giving him enough but I have also asked him for so much to like time for us and to be alone. We have friends and family around everytime we do anything.
The not enough sex talks where only when he was drinking and just being mean. Never have we sat down sober and expressed our feelings. I should have reached out more and he should have too. In the big picture we have an amazing life and get along great.
I am dealing with being broken right now crying a lot trying to get myself together but I am so weak. He is here with me and talking with me but the honestly of him not loving me hurts. We are going to go to counseling he wants to try and work on things. He told me he has not spoke to her but he did think of her last week.
I am sure these are all normal emotions I just don't know where to go. Today I got up went to the gym and am trying to take care of me. I deserve to be loved 110% and need to remind myself of that. I am willing to pray, go to counseling and do whatever it takes but I wish he would chase me more. I will work at it and keep this family apart but only if he makes it happen.
Just broken a friend sent me here she said this saved her marriage so I am hoping to read positive stories and get encouragement from you all. Thank you for listening to my rambling
Put the internet to work for you.
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