In our culture women are often treated like objects, especially with women of colour and how we are exocitized and fetishized. I think it's important to take a look at our sex lives and examine the reasons behind what we like and if any of those are sinister.
Obviously a lot of men partake in finding sexually violent and vulgar imagery and words arousing. With violent adjectives like "destroyed", "pounded" and "banged" all being used akin to an attack on a passive dehumanised victim, a thing, an achievement and conquest to be proud of feed their masculinity performance. I think if the guys you are sleeping with get off on degrading and dominating you, you should look closely in to that and check if it's influenced by latent or even obvious misgyonistic views. You should also look in to why you like be controlled and shamed with words like "slut" during sex, and address if it's perhaps you internalising sexism and also a bit of stockholm sydrome. If I was a black woman and I was sleeping with a white guy who used a racist fancy during sex, I'd definitely find that suspect, and these sexist actions should be treated no differently.
Saying women liking dominant men becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy when we are constantly told this by society and not actually given a choice. Guys slave away in the gym obsessing over every muscle, worry about their penis size, their stamina, not because of the pleasure of the woman or her feelings, but because of how it makes themselves feel more masculine and like real men.
Every guy I have been with demonstrated things you see in graphic pornography and views of submissive women, this content is probably created for the misogynistic desire and not causing it, it just gives them more ideas. When 8 out of 10 guy call you a slut in bed and assume you like it that's a problem.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment