Overreactions you shouldn't say

Overreactions to normal inconveniences.

Me:
"Where is the bag of chips?"
Wife:
"I finished it."
Devil response:
"Ooookay..."Loudly grab my coat and shoes
Wife:
"Where are you going?"
Devil response:
"To kill myself!"

*You catch your child drawing on the wall*
Child:
"I am sorry, mommy "
Devil response:
"It's ok honey. We are going to sell you to pay for the damages."

Text:
"I am going to be a few minutes late"
Devil response:
"I wish you were the load your mother swallowed!"
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