I believe it is important for me to step outside of myself to "self check" sometimes and in light of another thread on this forum about contribution and relationship balance I want to put ours out there as accurately as possible to glean feedback to test my perspective for holes... our relationship has been volatile for layers of reasons, but our biggest fights and most chronic fights center on one area "life goals." So here goes...
When H and I met in 2007 I came with two houses AND two horses. I am college educated and work full time and am the breadwinner of the two of us. My life goal I was actively pursuing at the time was adding to the number of rental houses I own for the expressed purpose of creating an income "floor" while I transitioned over to working with horses full time. At the same time I was working to add houses, I was working to advance my horsemanship skills.
We married a year later and by 2009 we had our son. Beautiful surprise!! Did not know I could have kids and thought it wasn't possible. It almost took my life and he was 9 1/2 weeks early, but survived beautifully! I love being his Mom and my horses had a direct impact in being a good mom.
By the time I met my H my horses had introduced the concept of healthy boundaries into my life by which I escaped abuse, created conditions by which I experienced reconciliation with my birth Dad, and had taught me to be a MUCH better person/mother for my own child. So, they have been significant in very serious good ways. I feel they were God given to me, life long dream and they are a part of my family and I had them four years when I met my current husband.
When he and I met, he was all about them. He flew out to Colorado with me to a horse summit. We had planned to marry on a ranch. Our original plan was to put ourselves on a property with them on the property with us so we could continue the plan of shifting careers for me, which I was already pursuing.
He also works full time and had never been married before meeting me, was living at home with parents at the age of 33. He is intelligent, compassionate and supportive, but ... within three years things started to change... more in a little bit...
When H and I met in 2007 I came with two houses AND two horses. I am college educated and work full time and am the breadwinner of the two of us. My life goal I was actively pursuing at the time was adding to the number of rental houses I own for the expressed purpose of creating an income "floor" while I transitioned over to working with horses full time. At the same time I was working to add houses, I was working to advance my horsemanship skills.
We married a year later and by 2009 we had our son. Beautiful surprise!! Did not know I could have kids and thought it wasn't possible. It almost took my life and he was 9 1/2 weeks early, but survived beautifully! I love being his Mom and my horses had a direct impact in being a good mom.
By the time I met my H my horses had introduced the concept of healthy boundaries into my life by which I escaped abuse, created conditions by which I experienced reconciliation with my birth Dad, and had taught me to be a MUCH better person/mother for my own child. So, they have been significant in very serious good ways. I feel they were God given to me, life long dream and they are a part of my family and I had them four years when I met my current husband.
When he and I met, he was all about them. He flew out to Colorado with me to a horse summit. We had planned to marry on a ranch. Our original plan was to put ourselves on a property with them on the property with us so we could continue the plan of shifting careers for me, which I was already pursuing.
He also works full time and had never been married before meeting me, was living at home with parents at the age of 33. He is intelligent, compassionate and supportive, but ... within three years things started to change... more in a little bit...
Put the internet to work for you.
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