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Stuck at home, this is so hard

I was the one that made a decision to stay at home until our child is 3, now our second child is almost two and i am a full time stay at home person. We are managing ok, our kids do not go without. I had an abusive past and now am reluctant to let anyone watch my children until they are able to clearly tell me about their day. I have put myself in the situation where ihave no car and no income. I believe i am turning into a mad animal staying at home all the time. We live in a town where i have no friends, i am from a different country, so all my relatives are back at the home country. My SO agrees with my position about daycare, since he himself had bad experiences with those. But now i notice that i snap every now and again, get angry really easily and just get mad for no reason. Anbody here that was in the same boat and how you dealt with it?

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