Another thread where the dissuasion of bad spouses and significant others vs incompatible spouses and significant others got me wondering what everyone's elses experience through life was. It's my guess that we meet and often time marry people that aren't necessarily bad people they just aren't compatible with us.
In my life I have had 5 serious long term relationships. Of those I would only consider one woman a bad person. So my list looks like this
High school sweetheart 5 years. We broke up because we just flat out had different views and philosophies on life. She wanted to stay in our same small town forever and I didnt. She didn't want kids and I did. She didn't want me entering my current career field and I wanted it. So we were not compatable for life but she was one of the most loyal women I ever knew. I do not think her bad or evil at all and from my understanding she got what she wants as did I.
X wife. Lasted 12 years total. I won't rehash everything but the highlight is she left me and our children for another man. I would not describe her as a good person, wife or mother. I absolutely think she is a bad and very selfish person who puts herself first in all things. I do recognize that some of that was her childhood drama which effected her later in life but don't allow that reasoning to excuse the wake of destruction she left through two families and 5 children's lives.
First GF post divorce lasted 6 months. She Was very controlling and wanted to control all my time, where I lived and who I had friendships with. She was not my cup of tea but I have no doubt she would make many men happy. I have male friends who want thier SO to control everything so it's not a stretch to say that.
Second GF 18 months. I really liked this girl and we were compatable on many levels but not time frame it seemed. Somewhere she got in her head that she was some sort of failure if she wasn't married again by 30. So it was a huge push to get married. I needed us to live together first and see how we worked that way. She wanted none of that and broke it off with me . I found out through a mutual friend that after we broke up she met and married a guy in 4 months so my suspicions that she only wanted to be married and not with me were confirmed. All that said I don't think she was a bad person. She just wanted to be married way faster than I wanted to be
Current GF 20 month. We live together and get along great. We do have some communication issues but all and all great relationship.
So what are your experiences. Do you keep picking bad people or are more of them just not compatable with you?
In my life I have had 5 serious long term relationships. Of those I would only consider one woman a bad person. So my list looks like this
High school sweetheart 5 years. We broke up because we just flat out had different views and philosophies on life. She wanted to stay in our same small town forever and I didnt. She didn't want kids and I did. She didn't want me entering my current career field and I wanted it. So we were not compatable for life but she was one of the most loyal women I ever knew. I do not think her bad or evil at all and from my understanding she got what she wants as did I.
X wife. Lasted 12 years total. I won't rehash everything but the highlight is she left me and our children for another man. I would not describe her as a good person, wife or mother. I absolutely think she is a bad and very selfish person who puts herself first in all things. I do recognize that some of that was her childhood drama which effected her later in life but don't allow that reasoning to excuse the wake of destruction she left through two families and 5 children's lives.
First GF post divorce lasted 6 months. She Was very controlling and wanted to control all my time, where I lived and who I had friendships with. She was not my cup of tea but I have no doubt she would make many men happy. I have male friends who want thier SO to control everything so it's not a stretch to say that.
Second GF 18 months. I really liked this girl and we were compatable on many levels but not time frame it seemed. Somewhere she got in her head that she was some sort of failure if she wasn't married again by 30. So it was a huge push to get married. I needed us to live together first and see how we worked that way. She wanted none of that and broke it off with me . I found out through a mutual friend that after we broke up she met and married a guy in 4 months so my suspicions that she only wanted to be married and not with me were confirmed. All that said I don't think she was a bad person. She just wanted to be married way faster than I wanted to be
Current GF 20 month. We live together and get along great. We do have some communication issues but all and all great relationship.
So what are your experiences. Do you keep picking bad people or are more of them just not compatable with you?
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