My husband and I have been married for about a year and a half, after dating for the 4 years prior. I am 24 and he is 25 and we have both only dated each other. I am feeling so conflicted and I just want to hear what others have done in similar situations.
I had serious doubts about our relationship a number of times during our dating lives, but I told myself that it was easier, safer, and more comfortable to stay in the relationship. I was graduating college and starting an extremely stressful new job around the time we got engaged. I was so overwhelmed with the stress of this job that my then fiancé became my rock. I felt so much love for him during that time, but I now wonder if it was just the comfort and stability I was craving.
Anyways, since we have been married, I have been unhappy. There are physical traits about my husband that I just really dislike. He has not changed, but I think I have. When we started dating, all of the guys were scrawny. Now that I am 24 and seeing what most men look like, I look at my husband with disgust. His size is not something that can change, but I struggle with feeling attracted to him. Hugging, cuddling, and sex are hard because I just don't find him attractive. The physical traits I am interested in are all things he is lacking in. It goes beyond the physical too. He has recently developed OCD and refuses to get help. It makes me nauseous to see him have to check the locks over and over or drive around the block for fear he hit someone with his car.
I am so young and I just feel so angry with myself for getting married. I know I should have waited a few more years and I would have realized he is not "the one" for me. But, now I'm stuck and trying really hard to work on this so we can be happy again. Any advice?
I had serious doubts about our relationship a number of times during our dating lives, but I told myself that it was easier, safer, and more comfortable to stay in the relationship. I was graduating college and starting an extremely stressful new job around the time we got engaged. I was so overwhelmed with the stress of this job that my then fiancé became my rock. I felt so much love for him during that time, but I now wonder if it was just the comfort and stability I was craving.
Anyways, since we have been married, I have been unhappy. There are physical traits about my husband that I just really dislike. He has not changed, but I think I have. When we started dating, all of the guys were scrawny. Now that I am 24 and seeing what most men look like, I look at my husband with disgust. His size is not something that can change, but I struggle with feeling attracted to him. Hugging, cuddling, and sex are hard because I just don't find him attractive. The physical traits I am interested in are all things he is lacking in. It goes beyond the physical too. He has recently developed OCD and refuses to get help. It makes me nauseous to see him have to check the locks over and over or drive around the block for fear he hit someone with his car.
I am so young and I just feel so angry with myself for getting married. I know I should have waited a few more years and I would have realized he is not "the one" for me. But, now I'm stuck and trying really hard to work on this so we can be happy again. Any advice?
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