What a mess!

My stbxw and I have been married for almost 16yrs. Our fun started in May of this year. I had started to notice small changes in her the month before. like pulling away from me and the kids if we didn't act the way she thought. She also started drinking more,texting more and talking less. There were changes with her that I could tell from the bedroom if you know what I mean. Also on the first of May she went to the doctors and was given an anti-depressant. That she stopped taking on 3 may. I took note of all of this but just took it as odd.I didn't read anything into it until the night of the 3 May. That day we had a good time. We went up town and out to lunch/ shopping. We got back to the house early and had a quickie in the truck. After that we went inside then picked up the kids at school. Normal night. The kids went to bed and she settled in her chair with a glass of wine and her phone. At about 11:30 I got up and went to bed. On my way I gave her a kiss and asked who she way talking to. She answered Sharron. I told her not to stay up to late and hit the pillow. I was woke up at 1AM to her just weeping and chanting I hate you over and over again. This went on for about 10min before she tired to send a text to someone saying I hate you, I Fing hate you. i waited for a few min more then got up and went to the bathroom. When I came out she was trying to compose herself. I asked what was wrong. She said it was the people at work They just never listen to me. I knew what the truth was then. I couldn't go back to sleep. BTW she drank a bottle of wine from 9-12AM. The next two days she was a Big B to me and short with the kids. On Monday the 6th she came home in a good mood and she kept getting sweeter each day. This did nothing but to put my hackles up. The night of the 19th is when I went in and asked her. She was sitting on the bed texting and drinking. When I told her what I have seen going on she tilted her head to the side and got a big smerk on her face. I now realize that she wasn't being smug it was OH ship he knows. I turned and left. I went back in a while latter and asked again. This time she broke in and and said "I did it, I had an affair." Then says but "nothing sexual happened." I asked with who and she said no she was not going to tell me. So I took her phone off the bed and told her I was going to start texting people asking who she had an affair with. She came up off the bed and started to attack me.Hitting and clawing at me trying to get her phone back. This went on for 3-4 min until I turned my back on her. Thats w hen she jumped on my back with her arm around my throat. I got her off and held her back. We ended up talking outside. I asked her if she wanted to have sex with him. She closed her eyes with a smile on her face. She pumped her fists up and down while saying " I really really wanted to." Just like she was remembering. There was all the normal I love you but im not in love with you. I'm not going to tell you who he is because it would tear his family apart. She left at around 4am. Who was the first person she called? Him.

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