The OM Social Stigma: confused.

I don't know whether I'm being naive here, so shoot me down if I am...but I have a query about the oft-used term 'PoS OM'. In my own marriage, I got to develop an obsession for my wife's OM and was always trying to work out how I could get her back by competing with him. I'm new here and I've been reading a few of the lengthier 'classic' threads and from what I see, the OM seems to be..'What Women Want'? In almost all of these threads the advice and encouragement given to the Betrayed Husband is to: * better yourselves * get down the gym and get muscular * eat better * drink less alcohol * raise your Sexual Ranking' Sorry Ive I've misunderstood, but arent all of these things 'positive aspects' improving yourself that attract a woman in general....and if so, by that logic, the OM must have something going for him other than being a 'devious, sly, no morals b@5tard'? The threads Ive read and picked up on in specific are Eric415's and RDMU's whereby, in a supposedly safe and solid marriage, the OM seem to have totally captivated the wife in a way that the loving husband never could compete with (up to a point): intelligent, attractive, successful, physically built, sexually adventurous, machiavellian/go-getter types... Is the OM really a 'PoS' or, like me, did the husband 'drop the ball' and the wife looked around and found someone better? Confused. :confused:

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