Why can't we just talk about it?

As I have been here I realize that one thing comes up more often and it should be easy to fix many problems in general. Why can't couples just sit down and talk? I will not say my marriage is perfect but I think one of the things that has helped is the ability to sit down and talk. I also have found that when we have refused to talk and let our egos and pride get in the way the arguments drag on for days. It is until we sit down, and talk, we do not accuse each other. We say how we see things and how we feel. If one of us starts getting angry we remind each other that we are talking about it not arguing. Another thing we do and has helped is to give a peace offering. This can be a snack, a beer, a hug, a warm blanket, an apology. How do you defuse your problems? Can you or do you "talk about it'?

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