devastated... marriage is not working out

hi, maybe I am seeking some advice or just trying to man up or just want to make sure I am making the correct choice... My wife is older than me few years, Japanese I am european .... First year she was great partner, lover, friend .. then she had a health problems and had to leave, I asked her to come back to me and she did ,, we lived in difrent countries for another 3 years before getting married (no ceremony). We just entered 4 year of marriage and it been a hell for the past 3 years. She rejected me long time ago, complains, nag, hates my family (brings it up all the time, I naver complaned about hers), sleeps in another room, ignore me, doeas internet all day eberyday, doesnt work. She doesnt have a problem with: washing, cleaning (thou we have a house cleaning person every week), cooking and shopping (partially since I do it too). Even I wanted she will not allow me to do any of those things telling me I am dirty etc. She tells me I stink, esentially treat me like lower race these days, complaining about everything. She desont go out, doesnt talk to me, but leave in the house I rent, pay for along with all the supplies. I have no life, we live in a foreign country, I cannt make frinds, invite anybody. We used to fight a lot, which at time ened up badly, Either she was slapped or I was badly bitten. She never listens or accept my points. Now I fed up fighting with her for about a year. I just tell her we are grown up people and can sort this out like grown ups. But she doesnt listen and bring things up from the past every day. I do not believe in dovirce as a solution, but I tried many things already, and she wont even talk to me. She doesnt want kids, sex, she despises me, she says only reason she is here cos she deaont have a money to buy a flight ticket back home. I am very tired and unhappy and very sad my wife abandoned me and blames me for everything. I spend most of my time outside work just staring at my lapotp at home. I dont drink or smoke or socialize. I do sport every second day. For me it is devastating since I did not think I will have to think about divorce ever let alone after 3 years of marriage. It has been mentally so exhausting and I have to train myslef to cope with all the complaining and nagging I get every day. Before we were married I was not a greta guy to her, but since we got married I thought I changed a lot and tried to make her happy. So I am asking her why you do this to us. She says that is her revenge on me. This is not how I would imagine responsinble and grown up people would behave. I am devastated ....

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