separated but confused

I am loooking for advice on my current relation with my ex. Quick recap: last december, she says we need to work on our relation, early says we are done i dont love you anymore, i was devastated. She bought a condo a couple of weeks later and moved out last month. She had been, for at least 2 years, getting more and more frustrated with her job, the kids and me. She just wanted to be out of the house. Everybody as felt her anger and it was tough. She turned 40 this year. She had a stresful time at work and was finishing a masters degree part-time. I happened to see her a couple of times crying, and when i asked why she told me that she felt like she was going crazy. She has had some health issues that would not react to medication. Also both her grandparents died in the last 3 years. After she movedout i asked her how she felt when were living together, she said that she felt unloved, alone and that she was slowly dying! When i asked about her saying she did not love me, she sais she did no what else to tell me. It looks like she might be having a midlife crisis but there is something weird in her behaviour: she is feeling depressed alot of the time and trying to talk about any emotions makes her cry. Says that she is crashing! I am unable to talk about us because it pushes her away. But this is nothing, she insists on seeing me and she wants me in her life. We have started to plan activities every week in secret, nobody must know (we have 2 kids). We have been having a lot of fun together and enjoying each others company but i can not talk about our relationship, she likes it the way it is now, no stress, nothing from the past. Even weirder, she as been more physical latelly and on our last activity, our bodies were touching for at least an hour. I can flirt with her and she shows me signs that she likes it but when i try to kiss her or be intimate, she says no and usually starts to cry? What is going on with her? She wants us to hangout together and says that she really enjoys herself. I have asked on numerous occasions if she had an affair and she said NO? Any advice would help on how to proceed? We are getting closer and closer but i do not want to put any pressure on her because it backfired in the past. On the other hand, i do not want to miss my chance.

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