How I am going to try and move forward.

I have been reading a lot more lately. This morning, I woke up and decided to put this all together. I thought I would share it with you. It is a culmination of personal thoughts, ideas from different sources I have read and recommendations from people I love and trust. "Take what you like and leave the rest behind." I am hoping it will help me ACCEPT what needs to be done. I have kept telling myself that letting go of him is the hardest thing I am going to do. But it does not matter anymore. It has come to a point that letting go is now a requirement for me to not lose more of my life and make the situation more confusing for my children. I fear "truly letting go" is going to be difficult for me. However, I need to remind myself that in other tough times I have been able to move forward. I just need to do it again. I am also starting to accept that it may be freeing for me. I need to get control of myself, my mind and where I put my energy. It isn't easy, but I must. It has been keeping me stuck for over two years. So I need to try this, if I still love him, then let him go, let him live his life. Let him try a new relationship that makes him "happy" and stop my own suffering by fighting it all. He is not making this hard – but I am! I am allowing him to manipulate me. STOP STOP STOP. Relax and breathe. Even if I didn't do it yesterday, it is ok, start looking at myself in the mirror again. Just accept that it is time to stop suffering. He has been gone one year. He is going to do whatever he wants to do, I no longer have any say. He can make a total and complete fool of himself. But, I have no power to stop him (or her). I must stop; digging into all of their activities, spending my time trying to make sense of it, obsessing that I think his life is perfect and what may happen to him in the future. I must try hard to catch myself every time I wonder where they are and what they are doing. If I try really hard, I can immediately stop projecting and then say out loud- "I wish them well". :confused::p:) I seems the healing will begin when I stop looking and judging what he may or may not be doing. The truth can make me feel very helpless and alone. But in order to be happy again, I must stop denying it. Then, I can get busy creating my new life with lots of friends, new relationships, career, love and laughter. Let it go, and begin to place all of my time and energy into my own life and my three beautiful children. So even if it is 100 times a day, whenever I feel powerless, helpless, sad and angry, I must stop, take a deep breath and remind myself; who I am, what I have right now and get excited about my future ! I know I will be ok because I have: no guilt, shame or big regrets willingness to grow and take responsibility for my actions three children who trust and respect me the comfort that I tried as hard as I could....for a long time health, beauty, brains and exceptional common sense realized that I should listen to my gut instinct because mine actually does works (who knew?) incredible support and love from so many people-(Please remember I am not and will not be alone) the desire to "do the next right thing" and try to follow through with it the excitement of finding a new love and building a more financially secure future for myself to remember I am capable of always having HOPE for a better more fulfilling life. I AM AMAZING! Let go, let my higher power do all of the work and begin living my new life. Just remember to do it ONLY one day at a time!!

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Months after Dday and completely lost

Warning: wall of text/stream of consciousness ahead. Also, I'm new here so apologies if I don't use acronyms correctly. February of last year, the (eventual) OM began working with my wife (married 2 years at the time. We're in our mid/late 20s, no kids). At their job, their group of friends hang out a lot- going out to bars, hanging out at eachother's places, etc. Basically, They developed a friendship that at the time I deemed completely harmless because of the above and because to be honest, the guy was a bit of a loser. It's not that I was actively looking for signs of cheating then, but I've always been acutely aware of the fact that people generally do ****ty things and I don't want to get hurt. So subconsciously I told myself I didn't need to worry about this guy. Over the next several months, her behaviors changed pretty significantly, and I picked up on them fairly quickly. In the past, she'd leave her phone laying around and even ask me to check her texts, set her alarm, etc. Now, she was always keeping her phone by her, never letting it go, and keeping it on silent. Always texting. I was naive, and this should have been the only warning I needed- I didn't think anything of it. Starting in May or June, they began to hang out alone vs. with friends. I was not okay with this and I told her so. She told me I was being paranoid and that I was letting my anxiety problems get the best of me. It took some convincing on her part, but idiotically, I let this proceed. In August or September, he moved away out of the country to go to school. I was happy about this, but the texting continued. Facebook/text/IM. All the time. 24/7. I told her it bothered me, and she didn't stop. My suspicions got the best of me, and I checked her texts and Facebook. There was definitely some flirting going on, but nothing overtly sexual. I decided to not say anything and see where this went. I didn't want to reveal the fact that I was snooping if I didn't have hard evidence. On November 10th, we had come home from a friend's engagement party. We had been drinking a bit, and she told me she was tired and was going to go lay in bed and browse the internet. I found this strange, as our routine is usually she passes out on the couch with me while I watch a little TV or go on my computer. I loged on to her facebook, and lo and behold, I found what was for her the most graphic conversation I've ever seen. Really raunchy stuff. They were video chatting on facebook and typing since I was downstairs. I don't know how to accurately describe what I felt at that point. Shaking uncontrollably. Heart beating so fast that I thought I'd have a heart attack. Seeing stars. I basically had a panic attack, probably. I came to my senses and took a bunch of screen shots of their conversations. Without even thinking about it, I went upstairs and slammed the bedroom door open. She had heard me coming so had shut off her computer. She was naked. She said "I've been waiting for you to come up" and I literally almost threw up. Couldn't even respond. I went back downstairs, drank about half a bottle of wine, and then went back up and told her that I knew what she was doing. At first she pretended like I was talking nonsense, but she realized I knew and freaked out. She had a meltdown. Grabbed on to me while she was still naked, which disgusted me for some reason. I remember that part vividly to this day. Crying hysterically. Got the slow trickle of information. First it was chatting only, then it was a kiss, then it was hooking up, then it was sex. The trickle went on for days/weeks. Eventually I found out they had been having an EA/PA for 8 months. They'd had sex dozens of times. First with, then without protection. It makes me sick to think about still. I don't know why I didn't leave the night I found out. Most days I think I should have. I guess part of it is that we had just closed on a house a month before. The other (bigger) part was and is that I still care about her. I do love her still, but it's different love now, and it's changed forever. I have zero trust for her, and most days I think she's still talking to him or someone else behind my back. She unfriended the OM on facebook and swears they don't talk, but she's a smart person and if she wanted to hide it, she could. The point is that I have no way of knowing. Sometimes I want to leave, but I'm terrified of being alone. Sometimes I want to stay, but I'm completely miserable. I get triggers constantly. We've had sex, but all I think about when we do it is him and her together. I almost never initiate it. I feel like a zombie, like I'm just floating through life. I stay at work late because I don't want to come home. when I do get home, all I want to do is drink a couple beers and/or pass out. I start fights over this all of the time. She freaks out at me even mentioning leaving. She knows what she did destroyed us and is genuinely remorseful. But I don't know if I can forgive her. I don't know what the point of typing all of this was. I need advice. I need help. The best thing for me would probably be for her to leave me. It's just not fair that she did all of this and now I'm the one stuck making a life altering decision. Because of her being unable to control herself. We've tried counseling, but I don't feel like it helped- partly because I'm not sure I want to R. We took a trip. We've bought some furniture. It all just feels meaningless and worthless. Most days I think about getting back at her by cheating on her, but I don't think I could do it, even after all of this. Thanks for reading. The forums have been helpful (if not one big trigger).

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Husband wants me to work in the summer

I became a teacher 7 years ago and since then my husband has pestered me every summer about getting a summer job. I have done so a few summers, but this year have chosen not to. He is angry at me and says I am not working "together" - I say I contribute by my full time job, which is as a teacher 184 days of the year. How do I get him to agree to disagree on this topic - or is he right?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Is it just me.....or

Do we "America" need to just buck up, and take a broad sword approach to budget cuts. All this dancing around and snipping pieces off here and there, that in then end don't make a difference due to spending more in ear marks is just making it worse. Welfare needs the axe. Totally. Just gone. You don't want to work? Oh well, why should 33%+ be taken out of my check because of your lazy attitude. Health care. What the hell is that. Why is there plans for this that and the other making it so you need three to have your bases covered. I pay $200 a week and that still don't cover 100%. I understand insurance companies need to make money to continue on and I respect that. But come on. Number three compounds on number two. Stop all these stupid ass lawsuits that make rates go up. Doctors pay so much And hospitals too to the insurance companies because of all these damn tort suits that it makes prices smoke dreams to get anything done. Tort/Class Action needs to go, or be reformed. It has made medical carriers scared to fart let alone practice medicine, which I turn makes out pockets lighter by the day. Food stamps. Again, get work, figure it out. Florida is boasting their employment now, but like one out of five are on some sort of social care. What the hell. Who can pay for that? End of rant/soapbox. FlGator for President.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Really like course mate! Don't know what to do!

Right, so here's the deal. I've started really liking one of my coursemates at uni and I really have no idea what to do about it! We've both just finished 1st year and are both going on our year abroad next month and going to the same place. We both get on well and I do consider us good friends but I'm really unsure as to what to do next. I do consider myself quite quiet, although my friends would say otherwise, and I really don't know what to do in this situation 'cause I don't want to make things awkward if things don't go to plan, but at the same time I want to give it a shot. Any advice would be helpful

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

My ex has just texted me

I thought she was angry at me as when I asked her if she wanted to meet up last week she said no, but now she's just texted me saying "Yay, Murray!" she knows I'm a huge fan of Andy Murray. We watches Wimbledon together last year when we were still together... Why did she send that text?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Is this emotional abuse?

Hi, this is my first post. I'm here because I'm really confused and thought maybe other opinions would convince me. My H and I are in our late thirties, have been a couple for 11 years and married for 6. We have no kids and we both work full-time. To most people, we probably look like we have a great life. The thing is, my H has almost no tolerance for stress or frustration. Even good stress, like going on vacation or traveling to see family, throws him off. When he's stressed or frustrated, he'll either go into angry sulks (not speaking to me) or he'll get extremely negative and critical about everything or he'll explode into tantrums. Usually he'll switch between those three options. He's never been physically abusive--never touched me in anger at all--but he'll punch the dashboard in the car, or throw small things in the house, or pound his fist on the table, things like that. He's thrown things at our pets a couple times, even though normally he dotes on them. Most often he'll just scream and rage and swear. Usually his rages start out directed at something out of his control that's making him angry, like bad weather or bad traffic or computer problems, something like that, but if I try to sooth him or fix things or offer any advice/comfort/anything at all, he'll turn the rage on me, verbally. So most of the time I end up just freezing up, hoping to stay out of his way. If I can leave when he's like this, I do (go into another room or whatever) but he seems to do it a lot in the car, where I am trapped with him. He's been like this as long as I've known him, but it seems to be slowly getting worse. His rages this last year have been worse and more directed at me than they used to be. Between these tantrums, if life is calm, he can be very sweet and loving, but I'm having a harder and harder time relaxing and trusting the sweet version of him. And that makes me feel guilty, like I'm not being a good wife and forgiving him....but then, he never apologizes, either. He just acts like nothing happened. Sometimes he claims to not remember his tantrums, and I don't know if he's just saying that or if he really doesn't remember. I've asked my H a couple times to go to counseling with me, but he refuses and says he never will. He was in therapy for anxiety as a teenager and says he "knows what it's all about and won't do that sh&% again". I've just recently started going to therapy on my own. My therapist said that she's concerned there is emotional abuse in my relationship. I know there's definitely something WRONG in my relationship, but using the word "abuse" feels so melodramatic....when I think of abuse, I think of a man calling his wife a b---- and throwing her against a wall. My H doesn't lay a hand on me, and like I said, his rages often aren't even directed at me unless I put myself in his sights. But I'm intimidated and frightened by his anger, and each time he throws a tantrum, I feel like I pull further and further away from him emotionally, and it's getting harder and harder to find my way back. When I've tried to talk to my H about these things, he usually turns the discussion to be about how hard his life is (he has some medical problems, he hates his job, he hates where we live, etc, etc) and says that I'm not sympathetic enough and I don't try hard enough to understand him. I've told him repeatedly that his anger frightens me, and he always shrugs it off. The last time I said it, he answered, "I know you're afraid, but really, what are you worried about? I wouldn't hit you." I didn't even know what to say to that. I've gotten to the point where I love him and care about him, but I really don't like him anymore. I feel like I'm on guard whenever I'm around him, just waiting to see what his mood will be like. And of course even writing that makes me feel guilty. I guess my question is, is this abuse? Am I crazy? I feel like our relationship is unhealthy, but my H seems to think everything is fine.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

I feel horrible, potential with a person with Cystic Fibrosis?

Hello all, I am feeling somewhat melancholy at the moment. Basically I've met this girl through a mutual friend and she seems just too good to be true. She's funny, smart, ambitious and everything really, not to mention she's absolutely my type in every respect. We've met up a few times for dates and it's going really well (on our sixth now)! However this is going to sound pretty awful but... I'm unsure about the future because I've found out she has Cystic Fibrosis. Now I know the jist of the disease, but the only reason I am cautious is that the average life span seems to be 20's/30's dependent on the mutation. I mean, what would any of you do in my position? She keeps very fit and exercises every other day, however she's been to hospital a couple of times recently, even days at a time due to a flare up of the condition. So my head is just a little messed up at the moment, when thinking of the long-term I feel as if I am putting myself in a position where in 5-10 years time I could lose them. I know this sounds pretty awful and I realise that many will judge me, heck I'd do the same if I was reading this thread from someone elses perspective. Any advice would be great, I just need some other views in what any of you would do in my position. Thanks all

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Always had disparate sex drives, trying to deal after Affairs

Back story: I moved out of the house June 2012 because of my H's anger issues. I was going to divorce him, although I still loved him. He asked if I would reconsider and continue our relationship in separate houses if he promised to get help with his anger issues. I agreed, but on the condition that we were still bound by our vows - i.e. that there was fidelity on both sides, like before we moved in together, but were still dating. He agreed. I found out in March that he had had an affair from September - December 2012. Then found out in May that there was another from Dec 2012 to Jan 2013, plus an ongoing contact with an OW he met on a dating site. I put a stop to the ongoing contact, and we have been trying to R since then. We still don't live together as we don't feel we are ready for various reasons. We had a problem last night. During our marriage we always had a disparate sex drive - mine is higher than his, unusually. Quite often during our marriage I would initiate sex, only for him to lie there in bed like a lump of stone, totally ignoring my advances. Eventually I would get upset and withdraw, which would lead to an argument. He didn't always reject me, but it was more often than not. Conversely, there was only ONE occasion during our entire relationship when I rejected him - only because it was late, I was dog-tired, I had a headache and I had to be up early in the morning. Every other time he has initiated sex, I have enthusastically gone along with it. Every single time. Fast forward to D-day 2 in May this year. I decided I was not going to initiate sex again. I was going to let him take the lead. I told him this, that I needed him to be more forthright in the bedroom, that I was tired of always being the aggressor, and that I needed him to be more caveman. I had also examined my feelings as to why I felt rejected and upset when he didn't want to have sex and I said that if he didn't feel like sex, to tell me, so there was no expectation. This seemed to work. He has been very busy with work for the last few weeks but he comes round on Fridays and Saturdays. So pretty much every Friday, he has said something like "It's been a long day, is it ok if we just go to sleep?" and I have not been upset - which is real progress for me. Of course I understand that when you're tired, you're not always in the mood - which is okay. So I was happy, that we had established that if he just told me in advance, there was no expectation on my part, and no need for me to feel upset. But then on Saturdays, when he hadn't been working and wasn't tired, we would generally have sex, and it was good. I felt he was really listening to me. He was being more aggressive, more caveman, and it was great. So, now we come to this weekend. Friday was as usual - tired, no sex. But then Saturday we went upstairs. He didn't say anything about just going to sleep, so I went to bed in my underwear, which is our tacit signal for me being interested - otherwise I put my nightwear on. Next thing I know he's lying there snoring away. I get upset. I leap out of bed, throw my pjs on and yank the light off then I lie there and seethe. After a while he wakes up and, I know this was wrong, but I start an argument. I end up accusing him of having an affair again, because the last time he lost interest in sex was when he was getting it elsewhere. He just basically ignored me. Didn't even deny it, or tell me I was being daft, let alone try to reassure me. We argued back and forth and ended up talking about expectations. he told me that my default expectation when we go to bed should be "no sex" so I said if we were going to end up in a sexless marriage, then we may as well divorce. Eventually we slept, but I didn't sleep well. He slept till gone noon and when he eventually got up, we small-talked for about an hour then took ourselves to the hall so we could talk out of earshot of DD2. Now, I am NOT expecting that he should be willing to have sex whenever I want it, which would be an unreasonable expectation, but I reiterated the idea of him telling me if he wasn't in the mood, then I wouldn't have any expectation. He told me I shouldn't have an expectation of sex anyway and that I was being unreasonable. He said that the onus should not be on him to tell me that he doesn't want to have sex. Now, I don't think it's unreasonable that there is an expectation of sex within a marriage. We are both still relatively young (I'm 40, he's 44), we are in good health, so on a Saturday night, not too tired, not ill, and no reason to get up early in the morning, why should I not have an expectation of sex? For me, sex is so much more than the physical, it is the ultimate expression of love. When we have sex, I feel cherished, loved, cared for, wanted, desired, safe. When we don't have sex, I feel unloved, unwanted, undesirable. I tried to explain this to him but his only response was that he didn't feel that way, therefore I shouldn't either. I reminded him that I wasn't expecting him to have sex whenever I wanted to, but that a compromise would be that he simply tell me, then I have no expectation and I'm not upset. He doesn't see why he should. I should alter MY expectations so that my default position is that of "no sex" like his is. We just ended up going round in circles and I ended up getting upset and telling him to leave. He also NEVER comforts me or reassures me when I am upset, which is a separate issue. he says that when I have upset HIM, he doesn't want me to comfort him, so he doesn't see why he should comfort me when I am upset. He says this despite the fact that I've tried to explain my needs. He refuses to accept that my needs might be different from his.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Persuading my friend not to wear the Burkha.

So i was chatting to my friend about her wearing the Burkha, I personally disagree with the whole concept of the Burkha. This is why: The notion that men cannot control their sexual urges and thus it is the responsibility of women to cover up to avoid being preyed upon is sexist, as it is parallel to the view women should cover up to avoid being raped and a failure to do so, accompanied by the rape of said women is sexist, misogynistic and has no place in a civilized society. Now my other friend who was ironically a feminist, accused me of being an 'Islamophobe' whatever that means. Which was funny because the concept behind the burkha is completely contradictory to feminism, or at least, what I perceive feminism to be.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Fast food drive-thru rant

Is it really rocket science? I just went to a restaurant and was going inside because the drive-thru lanes were busy. Alas...there were about 15 kids inside waiting to order so I got back in my car and got in line. It's one of those double drive thru lanes and also one of those where cars can come in the back entrance and sneak into line without having to drive around the building and stay in the lines. So here I sit, deep in the line, still single file. I'm next at the "split" and TWO cars come in that back way and jump right in that right hand line. Cutting in front of me and about 5 other cars behind me. When the second one did it I made hand motions like "What are you doing??? Get in line!" She looked at me like "Huh? What?" Then she actually put her car in reverse and backed up to let me go, but still jumped in front of the other cars. Rude people suck!!! And they're EVERYWHERE! Ok...let's hear some rudeness stories.

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

If you were stopped at DUI check point

How do you respond to an officer asking you to roll down your window? Realize that this video has been edited and who knows what has been left out. 4th of July DUI Checkpoint - Drug Dogs, Searched without Consent, while Innocent - YouTube

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

Saying no, or avoiding....

When my sex life ended it went from sex multiple times a day to multiple times a week to single digits a month....In the last few years, It has become almost nothing..... My wife did not like the confrontation of a face to face refusal, so her MO became setting an atmosphere throughout the day of being either too tired, or too ill, or too stressed out, back going out, for sex to be convenient...often with a subtile hint that things would be better different in the near future....Of course they never were...and still aren't.... How did your relationship become sexless? the woodchuck

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

27 year old mature student guy and dating at University....opinions?

okay, so I'm planning to go back to education, but I'm 27 years old and I worry about dating/meeting people at University. I am probably worrying over nothing, but I'm hoping I won't be at university for 3 years and not meet someone. Anyway, I will most likely stay in accommodation as I'd be moving away. I'm just wondering how easy (or not so) it would be to meet women at Uni? It seems to be a strict environment at uni, like bringing girls back even (not that I'm exactly after that anyway). just wanted your views on this?

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979

I am a bad husband

Interesting title... So, if im posting here then obviously my marriage isnt exactly that great. Why else do people confide in relative anonymity about some of the most personal parts of their lives? this is a relatively long post as most first posts probably are, please listen and if you feel so inclined, offer feedback. hi, im 34 years old and was previously married for 9 years. that marriage ended with ex-wife cheating on me with a high school boyfriend from long ago. we were terrible together and we both kind of knew it. we constantly fought, verbally and physically. it was terrible. we were mutually aggressive. i would say she was far more aggressive than me. i played my part, im no angel. ultimately, what i learned from that marriage was to know when to get out. man, this is going to get messy. during my separation from exwife, i met my current wife. i fell in love with her because she was everything my ex wasnt. of course i tempered my love with the knowledge that i may be using her as a rebound. i thought a lot about it and im positive that was not the case. i still feel that way. now, i had big problems letting go of previous wife. i had sex with both for a short time. current wife, g/f at the time, obviously was crushed and rejected me. because i am a stupid man, i again made the same mistake. after leaving her in a hotel room on new years night to bang my ex one last time, i decided that all i was doing was just not letting go of something familiar, even if i knew it was damaging. best thing i ever did. unfortunately, i have a 5year old that suffers from the split but i do the best i can. after working through all that, my wife decided to marry me. 2 days after we got married, i went to korea for a year because of military obligations. i tried to do the right things there but i failed. i didnt make it a priority to send her much of anything for valentines day, her bday, ect ect. now, i did send things? but really they were just half ass last minute things with barely any thought in to it and she knew it. i got to come home 6 months in, we both needed that. she ended up becoming pregnant during that time. she spent the last 6 months alone getting bigger and bigger. i finally come home and i had gotten out of the military for the reserves. its the equivalent of losing your job. so i come home, have no job, we have no place to live, and wife is preggers. fast forward to now. still no job [ i have been looking, semi-diligently. i could do better... ] and now we have a newborn here along with a 2 year old and a 5 year old. i have been working on and off for $10/hr cash job. during that time, wifey has to take care of all three. she has no job as she quit her job to go back to school in the next year using my gi bill. i love my wife dearly, she is probably the worst person i know about being clean. shes a terrific mother, honestly. shes a terrible housewife though. she hates to cook, she basically never cooks, and she only does dishes cause of the baby bottles. she does laundry, but only her own. i do any/everything else. since ive been home, she has withdrawn from me almost completely. she isnt intimate with me in anyway. shes constantly fatigued from being up all night with the baby. im guilty cause i dont wake up. i dont hear the baby, i dont fake the sleep or anything else. i told her she should be waking me far more often but she reminds me that my mammary glands are slightly underdeveloped vs hers. obviously she breast feeds. lol. so where were are now in our marriage is that i overcompensate for her lack of intimacy by fawning over her constantly. she basically ignores me most of the day and is annoyed by my presence at times. she doesnt say i love you, she doesnt hug me, she doesnt kiss me unless shes leaving somewhere or to roll over to sleep. some of that is who she is, shes never been super affectionate. im not ok with it but i have been ok with it till now. shes pulled back everything though. we fight over dumb things. at least in this marriage theres no physical or emotional abuse though. pretty much i dont listen. i know this because im realizing she keeps saying "we just talked about this" or some derivative there of. i guess really what i wanted to say is that im a bad husband because i dont listen to my wife, i ignore her when we talk, i ignore her needs to the point where shes considering divorce. honestly, i think she just wants me to grow up. the problem i have is: though i know what i need to do, how do i remember what to do when the time comes. example, i interrupt her talking and go off on completely different tangents. she gets really pissed and tells me that i interrupt her and dont listen. i dont consciously do this on purpose. she says that if i really cared, i would listen. that i dont listen because i dont care about her. i want to disagree but her logic is valid. i do care about her regardless of what she says. i love my wife more than anything in the world and i want to spend every moment i have on this planet with her. i want to win back my friend. i want to be there for her. help. this is probably hard to read. my apologies. i pretty much vomited my thoughts on the keyboard and this half assed stack paragraphs came out. if you manage to read and comprehend this, thank you for your diligence. lol

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979