| Hi, I am new to the forum. I've been looking for a relationship help forum and this is the best I could find with active posters, so here it goes... About 3 months ago, I started dating the most amazing guy. We were into the same things and had a similar view on life. We started living together within a month of knowing each other. We were best friends. As time went on, he became a bit more aggressive and controlling. He would say I was "fighting him" when I tried to have a discussion, had an idea he didn't like, or didn't agree with his. He started to get upset and would constantly threaten the relationship. saying he would leave, and who was going to pay all my stuff. Then it took a bad turn. He started getting extremely upset and angry with me, saying it was all my fault. that I stressed him out. and that it was because of me that he was behaving this way. He said I was ungrateful and that I told him he couldn't do anything right (which I never did). He started calling me bad names repeatedly, like a broken record. He said he would make my life a living hell, and that I had no power. I still loved him after all of that and wanted to work things out. I believed I could make him healthy again ( he drinks alcohol throughout the day even when driving, takes too much of his medication, smokes a pack a day, takes excessive amounts of red bull , and takes more ibuprofen than recommended for back pain. He also has a very unhealthy diet). So I calmed him down and told him I was sorry, that it was my fault and we could work it out. He calmed down, and the next day I asked him to go to the doctor. Turns out, I am pregnant. He immediately supported me and helped me buy very healthy food and vitamins for my pregnancy. It was only a few hours until he exploded again. This time, he threatened to take my baby away, to throw me in jail, and to make my life extremely difficult. He said I was a horrible person and extremely negative. He said I made him feel worthless. I managed to calm him down but the same scenario kept repeating over and over from simple things like, me asking him if he was sure something was refundable, or me asking him to make sure to lock the car. He would yell at me asking me if I thought he was stupid and it would all repeat again. I tried breaking up with him a few times, telling him this was not working out, and every time threatened to take my baby and throw me in jail. He said he was in control and there was nothing I could do about it. He also began getting extremely angry every time I didn't want to have sex with him, which after everything, was often. He said he was going to go out and find some girls to sleep with. Eventually, I agreed to have sex because I just didn't want him arguing all the time. So things got better for a day and he was nice, but only because I kept my mouth shut and agreed to everything he said. Once I tried telling him something he said offended me, to which his anger began escalating again so I decided not to say anything. One night, I packed my things and left. Thinking I wouldn't let my child be born in such an environm ent. When he found out, threatened me that I would be in a lot of trouble if I didn't go back, but then started crying asking me to return. He said he loved me and wanted to be with me. He said he was sorry, that he had made a mistake and that he would change. Then he said if i didn't want to be with him it was ok, but he just wanted to make sure the baby was ok. He said he would give me money to care for the baby, and then said he would talk to me later cause he had to go. Its been 2 days now, no reply. The worst thing is, I still love him so much. We spent every waking minute together. He was my best friend. A part of me wishes that its true, that he will change. But i'm so confused. He has no contacted me in 2 days. I don't know if i made the right choice to leave... Edit: Also, he makes quite a decent living. anywhere from 5-10 grand a month. I on the other side, am a 20 y.o (He's 31) student with no job and no savings. I have no money to care for myself or my child. | |||
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