Confusion and Sadness

Hello, So I'm seeing this girl (who happens to be married). I'm 30 and she's 25. She hates her husband and is probably going to get seperated soon (dont know when). We've been seeing each other for a while and what I started as an effort to help her out resulted in me being her lover for the last 10 months or so. But we've not been smooth. It's been start and stop for the last 10 months because I did not want to get involved with a married woman. But she was there and she was being honest that she would at some point break up with her husband. She's vulnerable and to many people it might seem that I'm taking advantage of her situation - I assure you - I'm not. I've stopped this thing 4 times in the past but I keep getting back with her. So in the last 2 weeks, she's gotten super serious - she's always texting me, messaging me on gtalk with all compliments and the like. I'm kind of getting frustrated now - I'm overwhelmed by the emotion. I've typically worked in some way to not get emotionally too involved because a part of me believes that she will not be able to leave her husband whom she does not love at all but is scared to leave which is understandable - she has a kid. I find myself at cross roads - she's a wonderful gal and i do like her. I'm often guilting myself for getting her and me into this mess - a royal mess where now I cannot understand what i want from her. It's super confusing - given that for a long time, I did not know she wanted me long term - I thought she was just doing it for the pleasure. Ever since we both got a little serious, I first accepted her passionately and then immediately I took a back seat. I'm typically a slow guy - I make the transition from fun to seriousness rather slowly. But now she wants more - she wants my emotion, but she wont leave her husband and I cannot ask her to because of the kid. I know she's been a positive influence on me and vice versa but now I find myself totally questioning the relationship I've had with her. It's really hard to get free time on her calendar. We meet rarely - at most once or twice a week. And I feel fine when she's around. but when she leaves, I find myself wondering what I did and why I did it. The relationship now has taken a dive for the worst where she keeps wanting more and more and is so far ahead of me that I have to keep reminding her that she's still married. I'm very upset because 2 weeks ago, I really loved this girl and now I'm thinking all this. I was making plans 2 weeks ago in my head with her but now I'm so conflicted that I'm losing sleep, my work is suffering and I;ve become a super unhappy guy. All I want to do is feel happy with her again and I don't know what I'm feeling. Please help. Any amount of criticism is welcome - I'm pretty sure that I've thought of all kinds of critcism already. Please help. The Sad Lover

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