Just a vent...Don't know what I want

I'll start by apologizing for this being so long. My mother passed away back in May and my father began a quick slide downhill, his health is deteriorating fast (failing heart valve/colon cancer). Near the end of August one of my sisters began pushing for him to sell the family home; Dad called and told me if I still wanted the house to make arrangements to move home to help him out because he cannot manage day to day activities any longer. I tell my baby daddy about the situation and how I had promised both of my parents years ago that I would do anything in my power to make sure they stayed at home he agreed that we should do what we need to do. I ask his parents/uncle to help out with remodel since money is tight and they are contractors. We discuss with dad what needs to be done in order for us to be back home and he agrees to bathroom being redone/and storage conversion to make a room for him. Work begins and the first week dad has trouble adapting to changes...baby daddy threatens to leave me multiple times and makes remarks about how things are not perfect how he doesn't want to be there (with dad). My dad yells and screams a few times over changes I had said I wanted but forgot. Baby daddy makes numerous phone calls about how I have to leave work and come home as soon as possible to deal with dad or everyone is walking. I finally blew a head gasket over the whole ordeal the other day; yelled at my dad about not trusting my judgement. Yelled at baby daddy for abuse/bull****/drama creation. I blow up at the in-laws for showing up drinking/slowing down the project/ and MIL for calling me a *****. I told baby daddy/in-laws I appreciate their help but will no longer tolerate the crap and if I continue to be given ultimatums to pick between my dad and him/them then I will pick dad because at least when he yells at me its for a reason and he doesn't call me names. Anyhow this leads to a long discussion about how baby daddy/me need to grow up and start acting like adults. He tells me his biggest problem with living with my dad is that he cannot be himself. I ask him what this means and he says he is a jerk and he cannot do that around my dad. It bugs the hell out of me that he justifies treating me like crap with endless emotional abuse as his personality. He fails to realize he didn't always treat me badly. He is currently making snide comments at everything he feels I've done wrong for the last 3 months. He accuses me of feelings I do not have whenever I talk to him. I do not feel like its worth fighting for anymore. I'm not getting what I value in a relationship there's no affection, kissing, sex, talking, spending time together. We're supposed to move the end of this week and I so just want to leave his things here at the house we've rented together for the last 5 years and tell him to piss off because even after a talk does not get that I want out of the relationship.

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