Dealing with the wanting to gloat

Well. I now understand the attack on me yesterday a little better. It's the kids weekend with Dad, and my son just gave me an update on the weekend. Apparently my STBXH was in a foul mood the whole time he was with them because, as my son overheard, the OW only seems to like him when she's drunk. Apparently there was also some discussion of their physical relationship, or lack thereof. Beyond the fact that I'm horrified that he's having conversations like this in front of our son, part of me wants to laugh my head off. BUT I'm worried about what's coming next. When we were dating (ages and ages ago lol) he cheated on me, then dumped me for the other woman. When the relationship fell apart, he came back for me. (yeah, I know. I should have know then, but in my defense I was in my early 20s and thought love could change people.) So I need to prepare for the possibility that he tries to make amends. I cannot take him back. I took him back after the original cheating. I took him back after the gambling. And I was willing to take him back after the recent cheating. But he refused, and then I found out all the other stuff. I cannot take him back. I'm just so glad I have this place to come to for sanity checks. Any advice you have on how to prepare for the possibility of this, I'd love to hear it. The problem is, I still love him. But that's not enough, not when he's demonstrated over and over that the only person he really cares about is himself.

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