Ok, men on TAM, I have to say that I am a secret admirer of all of you (well, most of you ;)). Why? Because you obviously have enough self awareness and a desire to understand yourselves, women, marriage issues, etc. to participate on this forum. I know it's not easy for a lot of men to talk about their feelings or share intimate details about themselves, but you do. A lot of you are making such an effort to make your marriages work, to understand what's going on in your wives' heads. You offer a man's perspective on issues that women bring to the table to help us understand where you're coming from (Mars? I think? :D) Anyway, I'm sitting here thinking about how much time I've spent here, reading, absorbing, ranting, crying...how many books I've read that might help me understand my marriage issues, how many counseling sessions I've attended, how many sleepless nights I've had fretting over my marriage. And then I think about the fact that my husband would never in a million years pick up a book about improving our marriage. He'd never join a discussion forum and spill out his personal issues seeking advice on how to understand me, to understand what makes a good marriage tick. He'd never sit in his recliner and spend hours googling info, reading articles, blogs, and so on. The best I can get him to do is agree to go to MC with me, which so far has been not too helpful. I know he doesn't think our marriage isn't as in dire need of fixing as I do. But even knowing that I'm unhappy enough to ask him to go to MC I would think make him at least stop and think maybe he could be reading, discussi ng, informing himself of our issues. But no. I'm doing all the heavy lifting, because he doesn't see the need to do it himself. So I admire you men for being man enough to suck it up and at least make the effort to understand your wives a little better. | |||
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Secret admirer...
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