Can't let go, got a bad case of "One-itis"

I've started a couple threads so my story is sort of segmented on the site. New readers, don't do what I did. Keep a continuous thread going. Anyhow.. Yesterday my STBXW and I met with an attorney to do a cooperative divorce. I was very cold, stern and obviously angry. She was more gracious. Backstory: She had an affair, fell in love, decided to leave me, moved OM in with our kids when I went on 2 months travel, and is moving into a new place with OM in two months. I moved into a new place last week. I thought I could keep hating her. I can't. I just want her back. The problem is she is the only woman I've ever loved (together 8 years, married 6) and *I know I'll get smacked for saying this* is the one I want for life. I feel like she is making a big mistake. Yes, she left her first H to be with me and now she is leaving me to be with someone else. No, she is not psycho, and no I am not codependent. I just know that she is the one but that she is flawed and now hooked on someone else. After reading so much on TAM, all of this seems preventable. What do you do when YOU KNOW that she is the one but you can't have her? She is the mother of my children. She is the light of my life. She is a good person despite her actions. She claims she doesn't view family and commitment the same way (obviously) but I know that's BS. She adores being with family. She is splitting our family up and at great sacrifice to me and the kids. I can't move on. I'm even feeling suicidal again.

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