I've been with my boyfriend for almost nine years and we have two beautiful children together (5&7). We were planning on getting married this fall and had many future plans set in motion, until about two months ago. About a year and half ago he became addicted to prescription pills and meth and it wasn't until recently I fully caught on as I am fairly naive to those things. Then, about the beginning of June, things really unravelled. He said he was doing something with the church and took 5 days off of work, and when he returned home drunk and high I became suspicious. After checking bank statements, phone records, ect. I confronted him and he admitted he was seeing someone. He begged for my forgiveness and wanting to keep our family I agreed. However, over a month long period he continued to see this person. He'd come home for a few days and alternate between wanting to work things out and then hating me and saying he was in love with her. After abou t 3 weeks I took the kids and left. Now, he has been in an op treatment for about a week claiming to be clean and sober. He's crying and begging for my forgiveness and while I still love him and want our family together, I have zero trust and no longer picture myself marrying him. There is also a history of physical and verbal abuse from him which he takes no responsibility for. Will I ever be able to forgive him and work past our issues, or should I deny him any chance of reconciliation? I'm so confused.
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