Hi guys, get some coffee or pro plus, or some form of ingestible caffeine, you'll definitely need it!
I'm here looking for some advice as to what I should do next in this problem I've been having. You've probably read hundreds of these annoying and frankly selfish rants on TSR, and this one isn't much different to be honest. I usually detest them too, but **** it, I'm writing one. Don't say I didn't warn you! Anyways, I'll take you from the start:
2 years ago, I met a girl in my Higher Chemistry class. She was in 5th year; I was in 6th year, crashing the subject. The first time she saw me walk in to the class, she said to her friend "Aww, look at the cute tall guy", she didn't think I'd heard her, but I did. It turned out that the guy I sat next to, who was one of my best friends at the time, had known her for a number of years. This essentially introduced us to each other. Throughout that year, the four of us (Her, my friend, her lab partner and me) shared general banter and became quite friendly. We'd always crack jokes and mess about, and a few times she said I was really cute.
After our final exams, and school (for me) was over, we'd occasionally talk to each other on Facebook during summer. One thing that always has happened, and it's what's made me feel like this now, is that she's always really late at returning messages/texts. I don't mean hours, I literally mean days or weeks. Just after I'd started my first year of Uni, I went to one of my other friend's 18th birthday party, which she was also at. The place was quite busy, but we bumped into each other. Again, we talked for a while. When I eventually had to leave, she came up and hugged me, and as I was going, I noticed that she was just looking at me and smiling. After this, we spent the next few months occasionally texting each other (again, because she's so painfully slow with it, but because of how much I like her, I'm patient with it), until eventually we decide to hang out one night after we both finished work. I could drive by then, so we just spent the night driving around chat ting, eventually stopping for a quick snack. We had a good time, and I took her home, when I dropped her off, she hugged me goodbye.
Eventually, one time we were face to face, I plucked up the courage to tell her that I really liked her. I'd never done anything like this before - I've never even kissed a girl, let alone have a girlfriend. When I told her, she just said she felt really awkward, and said she had to go. I'm taking this reaction of hers down to inexperience, as I don't believe she's ever had a boyfriend either. Her reaction wasn't particularly kind or nice, but I did just drop it on her to be fair, I was ****ing nervous! When we both went our separate ways, I felt so stupid. On one hand, I was relieved that I got it out of my system (because I'd never told anyone else how I felt about her), but on the other, I just felt I'd made a complete arse of myself. Did I really just do that?! I texted her, saying sorry for making it so awkward, which she replied to apologising as well, saying that she shouldn't have just shunned me. She then tried to change the subject to alleviate the awkwardnes s, thankfully!
Like I crashed Higher Chemistry in my 6th year, she crashed Higher Physics in her 6th year (which I did at Advanced Higher), so I always helped her out with it, even when she said that she didn't care about it anymore. I'm not saying I did this to expect anything in return; I just genuinely cared about her and helping her made me happy.
Anyway, after that disaster. we eventually got back to our normal texting regimen (remember - very distant!), until one day, she randomly texting me if I wanted to go out sometime. This was during the summer of her finishing school and me finishing first year. I said that I'd love to, and suggested a day. She agreed to that day, and we threw a few ideas back and forward as to what we could do. This was at the very start of the week, and we arranged Friday of that week. After hearing nothing from her, I text her on the Thursday night, asking what was happening. She said "Oh, I can't do tomorrow. Sorry". I got really annoyed here, quite rightfully, and went on a little rant, something along the lines of her using me as a last resort for when she has no one else to hang out with, and then as soon as she finds something better to do, I get blown off. After re-reading the message that I'd sent, I realised that I may have been a little harsh and apologised. Then she texted "You kno w what, I don't think we should go out.". I left her to cool for a few weeks, then just texted her a generic message, and she replied normally, as if nothing had happened. This was just at the start of the new term and she'd just started at my uni. I suggested that we had a catch up, which she thought was a nice idea. We met up and just walked around town for a while after lectures. Then we went back to our usual texting (yep, you guessed it, very distant again!).
In one of my texts, I mentioned my upcoming birthday (not as an advertisement for her attention; it just genuinely came up), and she texted back saying that we were definitely doing something for it. We went and saw a movie together. I had a good time, but I felt as if she was really bored and couldn't be bothered, as whenever we weren't talking, she would be texting her friends (another thing that irritates me, so rude! :p ). Bearing in mind that this wasn't constant. After the film, I walked her back to her flat (it was pouring with rain and pitch black outside, I wasn't going to leave her to walk home herself). Then we just said bye and went our separate ways. I keep kicking myself here, wishing that I'd hugged her, or kissed her on the cheek or something when we left, but whatever. Ever since then, it's gone back to her usual texting habits, but now I find that so much of the time she just ignores my texts completely and acts like I don't exist. This is what's upsetting m e so much now. I don't know what I've done to deserve that, as I've always treated her so well (except for that rant I had with her, but let's be honest, she deserved worse!).
Again, I don't feel any sense of entitlement because of the way I've always treated her so well, I don't expect that she should love me or anything for it. I just don't see why she's being like this with me now, since we've always been friends, and it was her that let on that she might like me originally.
I also don't know what my next step is. IF she ever talks to me again, I should probably just ignore her, because of the way she's treated me. I know I should just forget about her completely, as it's probably pretty obvious that she couldn't care less about me anymore, but I don't want to forget about her.
Incidentally, I was out with my friend (the one at the top of the page, you'll need to scroll!), and she came up in the conversation. He still doesn't know anything about this, but he said that she takes ages to text back. We were on the topic of friends from school. This made me feel slightly better, that it wasn't just me.
In fact, if she ever texted me again, I can see myself just being as friendly as ever, acting like nothing had happened, since we'd be back to talking to each other again, but I know that I need to let her know that she's been out of line. You don't ignore your friends, it's just a ****ing heinous thing to do.
Hello?
Wake up! Are you still alive after reading this short novel? I'm sorry that it's so lengthy and moany, I just needed to vent everything, this is just a big rant. I've condensed it as much as I can. I've decided to write this now, as the whole thing is just making me feel so worthless as of late. I'm just being a whiny bastard now, ha!
As you can probably tell, I still really really like her, I'm just pissed with how she's been treating me, and it's driving me nuts. At the very least, I'd love to even have her back as a friend, because I miss hanging out and like I said, I don't want to forget about her. What do y'all think I should do?
Thanks a bunch for taking your time to read this, hey, maybe this was somewhat relatable for some of you. Who knows.
Argh, I think it's safe to say that Dr Cox would have shredded all of my man cards by now, I'm off to lift some weights!
Oh, if anyone was wondering, "crashing" a subject, means to pick it up without having done it before. Like doing an AS-Level without doing the GCSE before it, I guess.
I'm here looking for some advice as to what I should do next in this problem I've been having. You've probably read hundreds of these annoying and frankly selfish rants on TSR, and this one isn't much different to be honest. I usually detest them too, but **** it, I'm writing one. Don't say I didn't warn you! Anyways, I'll take you from the start:
2 years ago, I met a girl in my Higher Chemistry class. She was in 5th year; I was in 6th year, crashing the subject. The first time she saw me walk in to the class, she said to her friend "Aww, look at the cute tall guy", she didn't think I'd heard her, but I did. It turned out that the guy I sat next to, who was one of my best friends at the time, had known her for a number of years. This essentially introduced us to each other. Throughout that year, the four of us (Her, my friend, her lab partner and me) shared general banter and became quite friendly. We'd always crack jokes and mess about, and a few times she said I was really cute.
After our final exams, and school (for me) was over, we'd occasionally talk to each other on Facebook during summer. One thing that always has happened, and it's what's made me feel like this now, is that she's always really late at returning messages/texts. I don't mean hours, I literally mean days or weeks. Just after I'd started my first year of Uni, I went to one of my other friend's 18th birthday party, which she was also at. The place was quite busy, but we bumped into each other. Again, we talked for a while. When I eventually had to leave, she came up and hugged me, and as I was going, I noticed that she was just looking at me and smiling. After this, we spent the next few months occasionally texting each other (again, because she's so painfully slow with it, but because of how much I like her, I'm patient with it), until eventually we decide to hang out one night after we both finished work. I could drive by then, so we just spent the night driving around chat ting, eventually stopping for a quick snack. We had a good time, and I took her home, when I dropped her off, she hugged me goodbye.
Eventually, one time we were face to face, I plucked up the courage to tell her that I really liked her. I'd never done anything like this before - I've never even kissed a girl, let alone have a girlfriend. When I told her, she just said she felt really awkward, and said she had to go. I'm taking this reaction of hers down to inexperience, as I don't believe she's ever had a boyfriend either. Her reaction wasn't particularly kind or nice, but I did just drop it on her to be fair, I was ****ing nervous! When we both went our separate ways, I felt so stupid. On one hand, I was relieved that I got it out of my system (because I'd never told anyone else how I felt about her), but on the other, I just felt I'd made a complete arse of myself. Did I really just do that?! I texted her, saying sorry for making it so awkward, which she replied to apologising as well, saying that she shouldn't have just shunned me. She then tried to change the subject to alleviate the awkwardnes s, thankfully!
Like I crashed Higher Chemistry in my 6th year, she crashed Higher Physics in her 6th year (which I did at Advanced Higher), so I always helped her out with it, even when she said that she didn't care about it anymore. I'm not saying I did this to expect anything in return; I just genuinely cared about her and helping her made me happy.
Anyway, after that disaster. we eventually got back to our normal texting regimen (remember - very distant!), until one day, she randomly texting me if I wanted to go out sometime. This was during the summer of her finishing school and me finishing first year. I said that I'd love to, and suggested a day. She agreed to that day, and we threw a few ideas back and forward as to what we could do. This was at the very start of the week, and we arranged Friday of that week. After hearing nothing from her, I text her on the Thursday night, asking what was happening. She said "Oh, I can't do tomorrow. Sorry". I got really annoyed here, quite rightfully, and went on a little rant, something along the lines of her using me as a last resort for when she has no one else to hang out with, and then as soon as she finds something better to do, I get blown off. After re-reading the message that I'd sent, I realised that I may have been a little harsh and apologised. Then she texted "You kno w what, I don't think we should go out.". I left her to cool for a few weeks, then just texted her a generic message, and she replied normally, as if nothing had happened. This was just at the start of the new term and she'd just started at my uni. I suggested that we had a catch up, which she thought was a nice idea. We met up and just walked around town for a while after lectures. Then we went back to our usual texting (yep, you guessed it, very distant again!).
In one of my texts, I mentioned my upcoming birthday (not as an advertisement for her attention; it just genuinely came up), and she texted back saying that we were definitely doing something for it. We went and saw a movie together. I had a good time, but I felt as if she was really bored and couldn't be bothered, as whenever we weren't talking, she would be texting her friends (another thing that irritates me, so rude! :p ). Bearing in mind that this wasn't constant. After the film, I walked her back to her flat (it was pouring with rain and pitch black outside, I wasn't going to leave her to walk home herself). Then we just said bye and went our separate ways. I keep kicking myself here, wishing that I'd hugged her, or kissed her on the cheek or something when we left, but whatever. Ever since then, it's gone back to her usual texting habits, but now I find that so much of the time she just ignores my texts completely and acts like I don't exist. This is what's upsetting m e so much now. I don't know what I've done to deserve that, as I've always treated her so well (except for that rant I had with her, but let's be honest, she deserved worse!).
Again, I don't feel any sense of entitlement because of the way I've always treated her so well, I don't expect that she should love me or anything for it. I just don't see why she's being like this with me now, since we've always been friends, and it was her that let on that she might like me originally.
I also don't know what my next step is. IF she ever talks to me again, I should probably just ignore her, because of the way she's treated me. I know I should just forget about her completely, as it's probably pretty obvious that she couldn't care less about me anymore, but I don't want to forget about her.
Incidentally, I was out with my friend (the one at the top of the page, you'll need to scroll!), and she came up in the conversation. He still doesn't know anything about this, but he said that she takes ages to text back. We were on the topic of friends from school. This made me feel slightly better, that it wasn't just me.
In fact, if she ever texted me again, I can see myself just being as friendly as ever, acting like nothing had happened, since we'd be back to talking to each other again, but I know that I need to let her know that she's been out of line. You don't ignore your friends, it's just a ****ing heinous thing to do.
Hello?
Wake up! Are you still alive after reading this short novel? I'm sorry that it's so lengthy and moany, I just needed to vent everything, this is just a big rant. I've condensed it as much as I can. I've decided to write this now, as the whole thing is just making me feel so worthless as of late. I'm just being a whiny bastard now, ha! As you can probably tell, I still really really like her, I'm just pissed with how she's been treating me, and it's driving me nuts. At the very least, I'd love to even have her back as a friend, because I miss hanging out and like I said, I don't want to forget about her. What do y'all think I should do?
Thanks a bunch for taking your time to read this, hey, maybe this was somewhat relatable for some of you. Who knows.
Argh, I think it's safe to say that Dr Cox would have shredded all of my man cards by now, I'm off to lift some weights!
Oh, if anyone was wondering, "crashing" a subject, means to pick it up without having done it before. Like doing an AS-Level without doing the GCSE before it, I guess.
Put the internet to work for you.
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