My bf of almost 4 1/2 years is still unsure about what kind of future he wants (whether or not he wants marriage & kids like I do). It has been an ongoing issue for the past couple years-ish and causing tension between us recently. He has asked me for time to figure out what he wants his life to look like, and I have always wanted to give that to him, but he never told me when he would try to figure it out by, and I let him know I couldn't wait forever for him to figure it out.
Last Thursday, I asked him about why he was feeling distant/closed off, and he said it was because he missed having guy friends (they all recently moved away and he's had trouble making new friends in the area), and he'd like to spend some more nights apart so that he can focus on that. It kinda hurts me that he feels like we need to spend more time apart, and it made me think about if/when we do get married how is that going to translate over? He also said that he'd have an answer for me about the marriage/kids thing in a year and a half.
I'm not optimistic about it, even though I'm trying to be and frankly, I feel scared, like I know the exact time our relationship is going to end. People keep telling me that if in 4.5 years he's not seriously thinking about marriage/kids with me then he never will and I should cut my losses and move on. I'm not sure if I can do that, but I don't want to waste another year and a half either. ugh!
Anyone ever experience anything like this? TIA
Last Thursday, I asked him about why he was feeling distant/closed off, and he said it was because he missed having guy friends (they all recently moved away and he's had trouble making new friends in the area), and he'd like to spend some more nights apart so that he can focus on that. It kinda hurts me that he feels like we need to spend more time apart, and it made me think about if/when we do get married how is that going to translate over? He also said that he'd have an answer for me about the marriage/kids thing in a year and a half.
I'm not optimistic about it, even though I'm trying to be and frankly, I feel scared, like I know the exact time our relationship is going to end. People keep telling me that if in 4.5 years he's not seriously thinking about marriage/kids with me then he never will and I should cut my losses and move on. I'm not sure if I can do that, but I don't want to waste another year and a half either. ugh!
Anyone ever experience anything like this? TIA
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