I've been at University for approximately 3 months and so far there are several factors that have been really annoying, I'll go through them below.
1)I dislike my Housemates.
Being quite an introverted person, having very social roommates annoys the hell out of me. They go to clubs at least twice a week, I thought this behaviour was only typical for 'freshers week', but not for my housemates!
I wouldn't mind them going out all the time, but I get pressured to go with them even though I hate clubs, my last experience in one included me getting soaked in someone's drink, slipping over on a bottle and nearly getting punched because a fight had broken out right next to me. This leads me to another point, my group is constantly trying to hook up with 'easy' girls at clubs, they know I'm single, and are making girls come and talk with me. Thing is, I have no interest in even considering having a relationship with anyone who goes clubbing regularly, I want someone who is as laid back as me.
Sure, I can refuse to go, which I've done a couple of times, every time I do however I feel as if I'm being left out more and more - this makes sense actually. The thing is, I don't want to be completely ignored, I don't mind having a brief chat, just not constantly. I think my preferred housemates would be friendly people who acknowledge you when you see them, but leave you to your own device.
2)I want to be alone.
This is the thing that my housemates would never understand. See, they are so extroverted it's unreal, if for an hour they lack social stimulus they'll drag me down to the communal area to have a convo with them. They all claim they want to 'live together' after uni and all seem happy about it. The idea I've been looking forward to after uni is FINALLY LIVING ALONE. They wouldn't understand why I would want this, enjoying time alone is alien to them.
3)I'm pretending to be popular - it's working... too well.
The reason I've been so pressured to go out, and dragged downstairs all the time is because I've been pretending to be popular. I wanted to fit in, so acted like a bigshot (I'm a compulsive liar which helps) Most of my housemates are in relationships, truth is, I've never even had a girlfriend. I put this down to the fact that I made no effort to interact with people at school, so thus never bonded closely with anyone. Another reason for this peer pressure I would put down to my appearance, I don't want to
offend anyone here but I know I don't seem like a typical 'introverted' person - as in, I make good eye contact, laugh a lot and generally seem happy. This behaviour generally attracts social people to me all the time - inside however I just want them to all piss off. I'm definitely giving off mixed signals.
In conclusion I just feel as if University is a battle for me trying to be alone, and everytime I let people down it makes me feel bad. If they hadn't asked in the first place everything would be fine, but I don't think they'll stop asking anytime soon, unless I openly state 'piss off' to all of them - this however, is something I can't do. All the anxiety generated from these problems has really impacted my uni work, I just can't concentrate. Another problem is that I've stupidly agreed to share a house with them for the next two years (and already paid for it). I don't know what's going on anymore. I'd like to see what you guys think.
1)I dislike my Housemates.
Being quite an introverted person, having very social roommates annoys the hell out of me. They go to clubs at least twice a week, I thought this behaviour was only typical for 'freshers week', but not for my housemates!
I wouldn't mind them going out all the time, but I get pressured to go with them even though I hate clubs, my last experience in one included me getting soaked in someone's drink, slipping over on a bottle and nearly getting punched because a fight had broken out right next to me. This leads me to another point, my group is constantly trying to hook up with 'easy' girls at clubs, they know I'm single, and are making girls come and talk with me. Thing is, I have no interest in even considering having a relationship with anyone who goes clubbing regularly, I want someone who is as laid back as me.
Sure, I can refuse to go, which I've done a couple of times, every time I do however I feel as if I'm being left out more and more - this makes sense actually. The thing is, I don't want to be completely ignored, I don't mind having a brief chat, just not constantly. I think my preferred housemates would be friendly people who acknowledge you when you see them, but leave you to your own device.
2)I want to be alone.
This is the thing that my housemates would never understand. See, they are so extroverted it's unreal, if for an hour they lack social stimulus they'll drag me down to the communal area to have a convo with them. They all claim they want to 'live together' after uni and all seem happy about it. The idea I've been looking forward to after uni is FINALLY LIVING ALONE. They wouldn't understand why I would want this, enjoying time alone is alien to them.
3)I'm pretending to be popular - it's working... too well.
The reason I've been so pressured to go out, and dragged downstairs all the time is because I've been pretending to be popular. I wanted to fit in, so acted like a bigshot (I'm a compulsive liar which helps) Most of my housemates are in relationships, truth is, I've never even had a girlfriend. I put this down to the fact that I made no effort to interact with people at school, so thus never bonded closely with anyone. Another reason for this peer pressure I would put down to my appearance, I don't want to
offend anyone here but I know I don't seem like a typical 'introverted' person - as in, I make good eye contact, laugh a lot and generally seem happy. This behaviour generally attracts social people to me all the time - inside however I just want them to all piss off. I'm definitely giving off mixed signals.
In conclusion I just feel as if University is a battle for me trying to be alone, and everytime I let people down it makes me feel bad. If they hadn't asked in the first place everything would be fine, but I don't think they'll stop asking anytime soon, unless I openly state 'piss off' to all of them - this however, is something I can't do. All the anxiety generated from these problems has really impacted my uni work, I just can't concentrate. Another problem is that I've stupidly agreed to share a house with them for the next two years (and already paid for it). I don't know what's going on anymore. I'd like to see what you guys think.
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