Thanks for reading and all advice to follow. I will be as brief as possible.
Wife of 21 years approached me about 2 weeks ago and we had a discussion about divorce and therapy. We quickly dismissed therapy and moved on to the divorce stuff.
I realized how much we would be giving up on and approached her a few days later about trying therapy. She agreed to go and, wisely, told me that she had no expectations beyond going and talking a few things out.
A quick background: We have been together since our early 20's, have a teenager together, rarely fight but have just distanced ourselves from each other. I have some anxiety and depression issues and have unfairly made these the whole family's issue. I, like so many other, internalize and justify all the reasons I don't need help and don't get it.
So, we went to therapy and things went well. We finally communicated some things and got things moving in a forward direction, not in a reconciliation manner but that we will keep our minds open and take it one day at a time.
After going through a lot of things I realize that I am the cause of most of the pain. I know I will change and get some help but I feel tremendous guilt for asking her to go. After seeing all these things I feel I need to let this go and try to move on. As of this moment we are set on following through with divorce and moving on. We have told family but not many beyond that.
Should I be feeling all these emotions? Is this a normal feeling? Am I giving up because I feel like she is the one who wants the divorce?
Wife of 21 years approached me about 2 weeks ago and we had a discussion about divorce and therapy. We quickly dismissed therapy and moved on to the divorce stuff.
I realized how much we would be giving up on and approached her a few days later about trying therapy. She agreed to go and, wisely, told me that she had no expectations beyond going and talking a few things out.
A quick background: We have been together since our early 20's, have a teenager together, rarely fight but have just distanced ourselves from each other. I have some anxiety and depression issues and have unfairly made these the whole family's issue. I, like so many other, internalize and justify all the reasons I don't need help and don't get it.
So, we went to therapy and things went well. We finally communicated some things and got things moving in a forward direction, not in a reconciliation manner but that we will keep our minds open and take it one day at a time.
After going through a lot of things I realize that I am the cause of most of the pain. I know I will change and get some help but I feel tremendous guilt for asking her to go. After seeing all these things I feel I need to let this go and try to move on. As of this moment we are set on following through with divorce and moving on. We have told family but not many beyond that.
Should I be feeling all these emotions? Is this a normal feeling? Am I giving up because I feel like she is the one who wants the divorce?
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