Drunk wife says she wants divorce

Last year she was going to move out but didn't. We haven't really worked on marriage. I try not to do the things that she has issues with. But when I do it triggers past actions and makes her hate me. So the night she told me I said I would take the kids from northern NY to Florida and Louisana to visit family and friends. I moved there for her to be close to family and friends for first time in 20 years of marriage. We and that I would bring them back in time for school. Not caring about my job or finances. I need to move family into house we just bought anyway. She says sometimes she can't stand me and hates me for things in the past. But she will tell friends that she doesn't understand why couples can't work out there problems and that her and her friends are lucky. I am really confused and I think this has made me sick. I have muscle cramps, swollen lymph nodes, and fever. I just don't know what to do. We normally talk and walk everyday. But I'm trying the 180 and not calling her but waiting for her to call kids and then not saying much to her. Lost and 1300 miles from my best friend. She also says I'm hers? Confused. By the way married for 20 years wit 14 and 10 year old boys.

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