Getting over the affair

Hubby had an affair with coworker which ended 4 months ago. He left the job. We have reconcile our marriage but I am still angry and hurt and can't seem to stop thinking of the betrayal. I knew the other woman and have emailed her and told her how I felt. Her response was "get over it *****". Every time I tried to talk to hubby about the affair he gets defensive and says when he thinks about it it makes him angry; he just wants to move forward with our life. How do I get over it?

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