confused!!

i met this guy 2 years ago in a club as like a random guy i just off with and he's 7 years older than me. we have literally the weirdest relationship and i dont think i know a single person in a similar situation... im kind of like a booty call for him (even though i have not once slept with him) but there is definitely some kind of emotional connection, i even had a short lived bf in between but even in that time i was emotionally cheating on him with this guy. we talk every other week and keep in contact with each others lives even though he's moved back home (london where im from too).. i only see him once every couple of months i really really like him, and sometimes i feel like i might even love him, i really dont understand how i feel.. i think about him constantly and im scared to reveal my feelings in case he thinks ive like ruined our whatever you call it relationship. what should i do? i literally feel like im going crazy! :( any help is appreciated.. sorry for the essay

Put the internet to work for you. via Personal Recipe 2629979