| I have been married for almost nine years, have two wonderful sons ages 5 and 8. We have had our ups and downs but always managed to work through it. No infidelity on either part that I know of until this story. We had an argument around Christmas about my wife continuing to talk for hours per day to her cousin that we loaned money to and he never paid back. She moved into the spare bedroom against my wishes and continued to talk to that cousin. I remained angry so did not plead with her to come back to our bedroom. In January I noticed that she was still talking for one or two hours per day, usually late at night. This continued up until the 21st of this month. About 45 days ago I checked our joint phone account on-line and discovered that the person she was spending so much time talking and texting (since she cut off comms with her cousin) was an old high school acquaintance who lives in NM (several states away). I confronted her about this two or three times, asking her if there was anything romantic going on, and she denied it. Last Friday, my laptop got a virus so I picked up my boy's tablet to check my email and her email popped up. I soon determined that her relationship with this guy was very romantic, and very fantasy-sexual. They were both telling each other that they loved each other, and he was saying he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. He also would send her short porno stories that he had written, saying things like, "Honey, I hope you enjoy this one". I also saw where he was calling me an SOB and other negative things. The phone bill also shows quite a bit of pic/flick texting between the two of them so they were likely sending sexual pictures or videos to each other as well. Well, I confronted her with some of the evidence and she said he was an aspiring writer who just wanted her to tell him if the stories were good or not. In anger, I went for a drive to cool down and came back 45 minutes later and she had a cop waiting for me at the house! The cop asked what intentions I had for the rest of the night and I said she was having an affair on me and that I was going to bed. He left and I went to bed. She continues to deny there was anything romantic going on. I also found that she retained an attorney about two weeks ago, so was likely planning to divorce me the whole time. I asked her to leave and left the house for a day to get out for awhile. She found and destroyed most of the evidence I had printed out and hidden. I got back just before she left with the boys. That was five days ago and she has not let me see my boys since. She just lets me talk on the phone with them a little before they go to bed. She claims she is "fearful for their safety" if she brings them back to me at the house. This is such BS. I have never laid a hand on her or them, outside of occasional normal spankings for the boys when they needed one. The boys love me very much and it hurts me when they tell me they miss me and their home. She is staying with a friend here in town. I have not gone over there for fear she will slap a restraining order on me. I have talked with an attorney b ut he won't be back for 20 days. I told her lawyer when I asked her to leave I didn't mean forever, and she could come back here anytime she wants. I even said reconciliation may be possible if she would apologize. Don't think this is going to happen. I am supposed to get the boys (for the day only) part of tomorrow. Any opinions or advice? Don't feel I can ever trust her again. She cheated, lied to me repeatedly, and continues to do so. Thanks.:confused: | |||
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