Is your Husband (or wife) in denial about your EA?

My H and I seem to be on track. After many outbursts, tears, thoughts of separation and despair, there have been some conversations that have led to us both feeling settled (I feel more stable and he appears to be ok?). Admittedly, we are distracted right now as we have alot of domestic activity this week and have been very busy, but throughtout this we have been getting along and physical intamacy has been regular (when it never used to be). I think I'm slowly coming out of the "fog". It would seem I'm having trouble "letting go" (still checking AP online status etc) I feel embarrased about this but it's a consolation to NC, which is now 9 weeks. It is getting better, and the best thing is I CAN see a time where I will do this less and less. There is some light I know. I'm still kinda stuck, but determined to stick to NC and work hard on my M. I know this will all take time and I'm willing to put in the hard work. I need some help/advice/input regarding my H's absolute resolve not to mention the EA. I told him about it in a heated argument a few weeks ago, at that time he asked me for details and I told him it's irrelevant. Since then he has not brought it up at all. During another heated fight a week ago he mentioned something about a "fling" and "insignificant". He is obviously minimising this in his head as a way of coping. Deeming it insignificant as an ego saving tactic? Refusing to believe it ever happened so he doesnt have to face up to it? Can any men out there help me understand his behaviour? How should I deal with it? I mentioned to him casually a few days ago "I know you shelf things in your head in order to not have to deal with them, you just dont think about stuff and it's easy for you not to, but do you ever think they might come back to bite you in the a**?" His response "It never has in the past" (?) He seem's to just want to move on. I do feel there is a huge pink elephant in the room that is being ignored. He is a classic rugsweeper, completely avoids any type of confrontation on all levels. But this is just weird. I feel like it's hard to move on. He is not holding me responsible or accountable for my actions. I feel terrible and want to make it up to him. I am 100% transparent, he has all my passwords, schedules, emails are open etc. I fear we are building up our M again on a wobbly foundation but I cant make him talk. Is it ok for some people to just deal with these things internally? I'm really confused.

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